Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Episode 5 - SmackDown! - Raleigh, NC

The WWE intro plays, followed by:



Impressive, loud and colorful fireworks burst upon the stage, with energized fans cheering ecstatically in anticipation of a great show…

"Reeling from a phenomenal super edition of SmackDown!, the #1 brand in sports entertainment, comes to you live from Raleigh, North Carolina! Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Michael Cole with my colleague, Tazz, at ringside for what is sure to be another action-packed installment!"

"If you close your eyes…" rings through the arena as Captain Charisma, Christian, makes his way down to the ring to a reception of boos, despite the superstar's warm gestures toward the crowd.

"And the opponent, from Battle Creek, Michigan..."

The opening match-up sparks what is sure to be a frenetic night. In a youthful showdown of technical prowess, Christian dodges a flying martial arts kick from the turnbuckle and sneaks in behind a recovering Rob Van Dam, nailing the Killswitch, an arm-twisting facebuster, for the victory. The crowd applauds both men's efforts.

"Dang! That's 2 tough losses in a row for my man, Van Dam!"
"True, partner, but if anyone has a fighting spirit, it's RVD."
"Oh, yeah, Cole. I'm sure Mr. Thursday Night'll bounce back."

********************
A plush white limousine rolls down the entryway, revealing a smug as ever John Bradshaw Layfield, who is set to lock it up with none other than the magnetic superstar, Hulk Hogan, primary kindler of the odyssey known as hulk-a-mania. As usual, the fans are going wild in awe of the legendary pioneer, but JBL isn't impressed, mocking Hogan on his way down to the ring.

"JBL ain't backing down, Cole."
"Well, I'm not sure if his wealth matches his intelligence, partner. I certainly wouldn't be mocking the future hall of famer."
"It's all about mind games, Cole. I ain't gonna fault JBL's efforts."

Hogan and JBL duke it out in a blue-collar brawl, a rough tumble worth cringing over, stiff shots exchanged for a plethora of minutes. But JBL's wealth can't match the might of hulk-a-mania, as the Hulkster kicks out of JBL's thunderous clothesline from hell.

"Look at the shocked expression on JBL's face!"
"It's as if the stock market just crashed, Cole! Ha!"
"And it doesn't stop there, Tazz! The Hulkster's firing up!"

As Hogan plops down with the intent of his vintage leg drop, JBL slides out of the way like a weasel and snares a roll-up, using the referee's vigilance to his advantage as he grabs onto the bottom rope for additional leverage.

"Here is your winner, John… Bradshaw… Layfield!"

"You can't fault referee Charles Robinson. JBL pulled a fast one!"
"Because he's smart, Cole! He knew the ref was watching Hogan's shoulders and not JBL's own money-grubbing hands on that one!"

JBL boastfully exits the ring, pointing and laughing at the Hulkster, who ashamedly shakes his head in disgust of the foul play.

********************
"My guest at this time, the Cruiserweight Champion, wild as he is, Paul London!" Josh Matthews introduces the lively competitor, but before he can respond at great length about his high-flying style, the crowd greets an interrupter with a unanimous chant of "Woooo!"

"Cruiserweight Champion, huh?" Flair cryptically comments, clearing thinking more than he is saying, drawling out his words. "Congratulations, sport. But this old man?" He points at himself. "Has been World Champion more times than you've sprinted down to the ring, chump! Woooo!" The arrogant remark still pleases the crowd, who repeat the howl.

"I hate to say it, but the Nature Boy ain't kidding 'bout that, Cole."
"That's why he's a 16-time world champion, partner."

"You know something, Flair? You're right, 'Nature Boy'. But… I got a question." London smirks at Flair, who has a self-important look on his face. "Where are those world titles now?" He coldly retorts and brandishes the title belt over his shoulder.

Flair's face flushes a deep red and his eyes begin to bulge out of their sockets, entertaining a mocking smirk for only a moment.

"Tell ya what! Maybe I'll just take your championship belt tonight!"

"Only if you can make it down to the ring without breaking something, old man."

********************
Up next, Eddie Guerrero's hip theme flows through the arena, along with a car horn belonging to a fine whip, a ruby red low-rider, but oddly, there is a superhero perched in the passenger's seat.
"And the tag team partner, Raleigh's own superhero, the… Hurricane!" Tony Chimel announces to the roar of the crowd.

"And their opponents… the Tag Team Champions… Shelton Benjamin & Charlie Haaaaaaaas!"

The match is a crowd-pleasing affair, both pairs endearing to the crowd, with the champions being more technically focused as usual, though some antics by the wily Latino win over the fans.

Just as things seem to be going their way, the tag team champions suffer a miscalculation of team chemistry and it costs them the match. The Hurricane soars into Shelton Benjamin, knocking both of them to the floor, as Eddie lands a deafening suplex on Haas, setting him up for the Frog Splash, which awards the colorful duo the victory.

"Viva la hurricane, Cole! Eh? Ah, forget it!" Tazz cheerfully jests. The crowd supports their hometown hero all the way to the back. Meanwhile, the champions take a dysfunctional turn of bickering.

********************
"Well, ladies and gentleman, this feud has not been for the weak of heart. This vile criminal, Muhammad Hassan, has repeatedly attacked the big red machine, Kane, for weeks on end. Tonight, things may finally reach a boiling point."

A short promo plays regarding the violent rivalry between both fierce competitors, but the match that follows quickly explodes!

"Kane pummeling Hassan up the ramp! And that scum, Daivari, trying to do anything he can to help his despicable partner!"

"That's good on Daivari's part, Cole. Hassan's in trouble!"

But the measly efforts by Daivari wind up causing him great agony. After Hassan is lifted over Kane's shoulder and driven head-first into the glistening wall of the SD! stage, the much smaller Arab interloper lands an ill-advised strike to Kane's back.

"OH MY GAWD, COLE!"
"DAIVARI MAY HAVE BEEN BROKEN IN HALF, TAZZ!"

Khosrow Daivari laying in a pile of tables and aftershock below the stage, Kane laughs maliciously, having just given the runt one hell of a chokeslam. Meanwhile, Hassan has fled from the assault.

********************
"Well, earlier tonight, the legendary Ric Flair had a bone to pick with young upstart, the Cruiserweight Champion, Paul London."

A video recaps the altercation from earlier in the evening. Paul London races down to the ring, but is eventually too anxious, as Flair catches an ill-timed dropkick and subdues the feisty champion with the signature figure four leg-lock for the victory.

"Yeah! You gotta give it up to the Nature Boy! Experience speaks volumes in this one, Cole."

"As much as I was rooting for London, I can't disagree, partner."

Woooos fill the arena as a humbled London scurries to the back. The same fans that once loved him have suddenly turned on him.

"Well, ladies and gentlemen, last week, a new World Heavyweight Champion was crowned as Shawn Michaels bested The Rock.

A video recaps last week's epic ladder match main event, along with the outcome of the sensational hell in a cell encounter that left Batista out of action this week and earned the Phenom the victory.

But tonight, another match-up is in store. "From Death Valley…"

After quite heated combat, Shawn Michaels misses his attempt of Sweet Chin Music and gets caught in Hell's Gate, the Phenom's custom submission hold, similar to the gogoplata maneuver in MMA, but controversy looms! As Michaels submits to the unwavering grip of the Undertaker, the referee counts the Phenom's shoulders.

"What the hell, Cole? Who won?"

Confusion follows, with both superstars claiming dominance, but it is soon interrupted as JBL snakes into the fray and levels the Undertaker. In collusion with one another, JBL and HBK begin to stomp away at the Undertaker, overpowering the Demon of Death Valley to a roar of boos from the crowd. The audience's displeasure is quickly replaced by immense cheers as…

"It's The Rock!"
"The People's Champ! Throwing bombs! Damn!"

JBL goes flying over the top rope after a brutal slap by the Great One, along with HBK who gets his spine broken, ready to be victimized by the popular People's Elbow. Halfway through the motion, the crowd is leveled by shock once more!

"What the hell?!"
"The Undertaker just put a boot into The Rock's face!"

The Rock recovers, staggering back up to his feet, but is leveled by a crippling Last Ride. Undertaker stands over him for a moment before turning back to HBK, lifting him by the throat, and chokeslamming him into the canvas.

"If that ain't a message of dominance, I don't know what is, Cole."
"I don't understand it, but it definitely seems that way, despite The Rock's good intentions."

The show closes to a mix of boos and cheers for the Undertaker, who is now coveting the gold championship in his deadly hands.

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