The WWE intro plays, followed by:
Bigger, longer and louder than usual fireworks burst, fanaticism filling the arena, thunderous cheers abroad…
"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Super SmackDown!
"Right on the money, Cole! Tonight is going to make RAW's Backlash bomb like the XFL!"
"I'm not sure if Mr. McMahon would agree, but I can't say you're wrong, partner!"
The action begins immediately, after Tony Chimel superfluously introduces the legendary superstar!
"Hulk! Ho-gan!!!" The crowd is in love as always. "The Hulkster's pumped up tonight, Cole!"
Rob Van Dam enters next. The crowd is surprised as Tony Chimel introduces him as "the opponent."
To lesser cheers but still a strong ovation, Rob Van Dam confidently strolls down to the ring at a leisurely pace. Hogan nods in the ring, watching the younger talent's convincing entrance. He's ready for him.
"My money's on Van Dam tonight, Cole! ECW alumni all the way, baby!"
"I'm sure 15,000 raging hulk-a-maniacs would heartily disagree, partner!"
"Oh, it's going to be a rocket-buster, alright! Ain't no denying that one! Ha!"
RVD's speed outmatches Hogan's deliberate and meticulous approach. Kicks land, but once the Hulkster squeezes his 24" pythons around the ECW prodigy's educated feet, the high-tempo is chilled.
In a non-conventional twist, Hulk recovers from a near-fall after a split-legged moonsault, courtesy of the high-flying megastar. He begins to rally the crowd into a frenzy and catches a defiant spinning kick. Sending Van Dam into the ropes comes to no avail, however, when Mr. Thursday Night grabs ahold of Hogan's boot in mid-air, inches away from his own face, steps over and lands a wheel kick on Hogan.
The mightily pro-Hulkster crowd boos, but a few cheers surface as RVD wildly acknowledges them with a wily look in his eyes. He glides to the top rope, rotates his body on the way down, but hits nothing but canvas!
Painfully tucking his abdomen, Hogan seizes the opportunity. With no time allowed for taunting, the Hulkster lands the Atomic Leg Drop with finality! Thus, sealing the victory to the applause of the crowd!
Afterwards, Hogan entertains the crowd and embraces the hungry challenger. The crowd approves.
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In a moderately good match, the World's Greatest Tag Team proved themselves against the Basham Brothers in a successful title defense. "Can you feel the heat? I lie, I cheat, I steal!" Coming out in a pimped-out truck of all things, Eddie Guerrero leaves the shenanigans outside of the ring.
Once the bell rings, it's all about him and the United States Championship. This Last Man Standing Match is the only thing keeping Latino Heat away from it. After a bloody, brutal contest with JBL, Latino Heat pulls out the victory. JBL attempted a Clothesline from Hell, but smacked his arm into the turnbuckle and was hit with 3 consecutive suplexes, perfectly executed by the technical sensation, Eddie Guerrero, who then propped the weary champion on the Spanish announcing table.
"I'm feeling froggy, baby!"
The crowd erupts into cheers that would precede the final 10 count after a table-bursting Frog Splash. Eddie celebrates in such a lively mood that the ominous cell above the ring is forgotten for a moment!
A video plays from last week, in which The Rock was defeated by Batista by a huge power bomb. Shawn Michaels isn't dancing tonight as he solemnly makes his way to the ring despite a bellow of jeers from the audience. Next, the Rock's music hits and ignites the pulse of the crowd once more! It's clear who they're rooting for!
IF - YA - SMELL!!!!
"Here he comes. After a heartfelt loss to Batista last week, I wonder what condition the champion is in."
"Condition? Cole, it don't matter. Look at Shawn Michaels! He's hungrier than Batista is for Taker's blood tonight!"
"I know, partner, but the champion has to be concerned about this awkward scenario-- a scenario made famous by the challenger for his title here tonight-- that ladder! As the World Heavyweight Championship hangs in the balance atop the ring!"
"Oh, look out!" Tazz exclaims, as HBK vaults over the top rope, landing on the approaching champion.
"The Heartbreak Kid not wasting any time whatsoever in taking the fight to the People's Champion!"
"And I dig it, Cole! Michaels has had a fire burning inside him for weeks! The crowd may be booing, but all that matters to that man is that gold hanging over the ring!"
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Despite the good-natured zest of both superstars, it is apparent that tonight is about the biggest prize of all. The match degrades into a brawl. HBK is deaf to the boos as he nails the People's Champion with a brutal chair shot that draws blood from the wounded Brahma Bull. Michaels makes his first attempt at reaching the title that dangles above the ladder, but the champion retaliates in time to save his reign.
Later, after a nip-up by Michaels during the People's Elbow, HBK's boot finds The Rock's chin, singing him to sleep, or so it seems. Michaels climbs the ladder a second time, only for the champion to battle his way back up to his feet just in the nick of time to preserve his status as World Champion.
Michaels kicks the champion off after they exchange punches on both sides of the ladder that precariously wobbles in the center of the squared circle. Immediately, The Rock returns with furious wide eyes, but HBK is the one that attacks first. He leaps onto the champion, but is caught with his arm over The Rock's shoulder, who slams him into the mat, the crowd erupting as the Brahma Bull tries his luck.
"Michaels ain't moving, Cole! The Champ's got this one!"
The Rock swipes at the looming belt, but needs to climb higher.
"One more rung and the champion will retain!" Cole explains to the fans at home.
"Wait - wait - wait! HBK!"
"OH MY GAWD!"
The Rock goes flying over the top rope, like a tree in a forest after being cut down. "TIMBER!" Tazz duly remarks, as the ladder rocks off the ropes, stopped from falling onto the mat by Michaels, who has just used his foot to kick the champion into obvious doom.
"I don't see Rock! Where the hell's the champ? Can we get a camera over the--"
One of the cameramen races over to The Rock's location as he lays motionless under the ring apron.
ROCKY! ROCKY! ROCKY! ROCKY! ROC--
…
"Hang on a second, Cole! What the hell am I hearing?"
ROCKY SUCKS! ROCKY SUCKS! ROCKY SUCKS!
HBK! HBK! HBK! HBK! HBK!
"I can't believe it, Tazz! More than half of the crowd is now chanting for Shawn Michaels!" Cole shouts in a shocked voice!
"Way to turn on the People's Champ! What the hell?!"
Meanwhile, the hungry proven challenger has reached too high of a rung to be stopped, despite a last ditch effort by a recovering Brahma Bull, who only reaches the surface of the canvas, blood trickling down his forehead as he is left to only look on as Michaels frees the championship belt from its mount!
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"I'm here with the new World Champion, the Heartbreak Kid, Shawn Michaels!" Josh Matthews, mic in hand, is standing lopsidedly next to the much larger HBK, who is covered in beads of sweat, but they shine far less than the gold over his shoulder. "How does it feel? You've beaten The Rock in the match you made famous!"
"I'll tell ya, Josh, my boy, it feels… good." Michaels answers in his snappish coarse voice, ignoring the bitter fans of the former champ as their disapproval sounds. "I told Rock I was going to take this beauty away from him. That's what I did. And as usual, yours truly, the Heartbreak Kid, stole the show… a-gain!"
A mixed reaction from the crowd follows, but it is clear that Michaels' mood has improved now that he has achieved his goal. Suddenly a huge shadow veers into frame. "Not if I've got something to say about it."
"Batist--" Tazz remarks, but stifles himself as the Animal continues to speak, ready for the imminent main event in his wrestling attire, despite his huge physique. "And by the way, skinny, once I rip through the Deadman and leave him in a pile of smoke and blood, guess who I'm coming for next."
"Is that right, Batista?" HBK meets the much larger wrestler's eyes. "Well, I've learned a thing or two from The Deadman inside the Hell in a Cell. I'll see YOU around… or maybe… NOT. But I'll be waiting." HBK snaps his tongue, but the animal only smirks devilishly and forcibly bumps his way through Michaels.
"Whew, Cole!" Tazz comments. "I - can't - wait!"
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A spectacular promo plays for the hyped main event. The Undertaker makes his chilling entrance, but again, Batista is ready to explode. It's a shock that he contains the rage and embarrassment from last week as hell in a cell slowly lowers around the ring. Afterward, the crowd is divided in half and busy chanting "Let's - Go - Taker!" and "Let's - Go - Batista!" respectively. It's a blow-for-blow affair, a brawl of all brawls until Batista goes flying into the cell wall, followed by an over-the-top vault by the Deadman.
"Air Taker! Damn!"
"Batista slowly recovering!
"Taker's out, too."
"Let's - Go - Taker!"
"Let's - Go - Batista!"
"This is nuts, Cole! Ha-ha! I love it!"
It's more of the same until Batista showcases his unmatched power and spears the Undertaker through the wall of the cell, charging forward like a freight train with the Phenom suspended over his brutish shoulder!
"HOLY SH**! HOLY SH**! HOLY SH**!"
"My sentiments exactly, Cole!"
Next, the Undertaker can't repeat an earlier incident weeks ago by dodging a 2nd spear through a 2nd barrier (the security barricade). The crowd is going crazy and so are Tazz & Michael Cole!
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After a commercial break, both men slowly climb up to the top of the dangerous demonic structure, exchanging heavy blows, the crowd reacting to each one, "boo" for Batista and "ay" for The Undertaker. It's all fun and games until Batista lives up to his promise from weeks ago, choking out the Deadman with a sleeper hold. He taunts to the crowd, signaling that it is time to do an ungodly deed. "No way, Cole!"
"DON'T! REFEREE, DO SOMETHING!"
But Batista easily shoves away Mike Chioda, who continues to plead with him from afar. The Animal fiercely holds an unconscious Phenom between his legs, straddling him and effortlessly lifts him up, roaring like a vicious beast. But! Fists are flying at his face!
"He ain't dead after all, Cole! Taker's throwing soup bowls!"
The animal staggers back, enraged and bloodied, aims a hellacious clothesline, misses. The momentum swings him back around. "Spear?!" Cole exclaims, but is incorrect. The Phenom parries the attempt and heaves the animal upside down and DRIVES him head-first onto the steel roof of the cell.
"TOMB --- STONE --- PILE --- DRIVER! OH, MY GAWD!"
"REST IN PEACE, BATISTA! GOODNIGHT!"
Mike Chioda counts the decisive fall as the Undertaker clasps both of the animal's arms over his chest and devilishly snakes out his tongue, rolling back his eyes. The organ resumes playing and the lights dim to venerate the darkness that has claimed Batista!
Kneeling down on top of the cell etches a legendary picture of the Undertaker into WWE history. Cole and Tazz are too astonished to comment as the picture fittingly fades to a final stroke of black.
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