A video package plays, with text appearing on the titantron as the announcer's dramatic voice stirs.
The time has come...
A quick flash of SmackDown's roster, all of them poised for stardom as rain effects fall over them.
To celebrate.
The previous editions of The Bash flash on screen, showing multiple versions of red, white and blue fireworks, sound clips of Lilian Garcia singing the national anthem, as the cheers of ecstatic fans from years past live on tonight.
To humiliate.
A brief video runs down the feud between Kane and Big Show, their verbal assaults on one another and especially their physical confrontations.
("I'm a monster! You're just a giant...freak. At least I've accepted what I truly am.")
To desecrate.
Muhammad Hassan is holding up the US Title, and in-ring speeches show him bash-ing the country it represents. He holds up his arms, turban on his head, gloating. But Kurt Angle is seen winning a Gold Medal in the Olympics, putting Daivari in the ankle lock. "I'm a real American Hero! That title should be mine and it will be mine!"
And...
To validate.
Randy Orton is seen declaring his status as the Legend Killer. Clips reveal The Undertaker's legacy. Tazz is heard saying, "That's what we like to call dominance."
And Edge... is seen stealing the World Title, cheating his way past The Undertaker in the rematch and bragging about his greatness in the ring. The crowd's boos are loud and clear.
Tonight... is...
The Bash.
And now, SmackDown! presents: The Bash!
Cameras fly to the stage for a spectacular fireworks display, patriotism shining brightly as red white and blue streaks fill the air. The crowd approves, chanting USA as the camera rowdily pans over the excited fans and Michael Cole's voice comes into earshot.
Welcome, everybody! To The Bash! I'm here with my bashful partner, Tazz, at ringside for what is sure to be an awesome ride!
"I'm about to bash you, Cole! Ha! I love it!" Tazz breaks out of his cool demeanor and horses around with Cole a bit. "USA spirit alive and kicking here tonight!"
White fireworks burst over the stage in the shape of a V as a shrill voice cries: ONE OF A KIND!
"And what a match to kick things off here tonight, partner! A 2 out of 3 falls match for the Cruiserweight Championship."
"No joke, Cole. This rocket-buster might just steal the show before it even gets started! Ha!"
Bookaya, booyaka... 61-61-619! Booyaka, booyaka! Rey Mysterio!
A fast pace would be an understatement. Mysterio lands dropkicks, Rob Van Dam looses the San Diego Speed Devil's mask with brutal, whipping martial arts kicks as both men utilize the ring to their advantages, truly crafting a story in the squared circle--a spectacle worth revisiting a thousand times over. Mysterio spins into a 619, his boots colliding with the face of Mr. Pay-Per-View himself, Rey assails the top rope and springboards into a delayed splash that is worthy of a 3 count. The crowd goes wild, but the match isn't over yet.
After catching Rey's leg after a barrage of kicks to his knee, Rob Van Dam lifts Mysterio's leg, steps over and spins his own foot into the chin of the Masked Sensation. It's his turn to fly and he crashes into Mysterio with the Five Star Frog Splash. 1...2...3. "The match is even at 1 fall a piece," Tony Chimel notifies the audience, who is on the edge of their collective seat. Meanwhile, Tazz & Cole can't believe what an astounding opening match this has turned out to be, with both combatants tenaciously hunting for the elusive Cruiserweight Championship.
"Here goes Mysterio--619, Cole!"
"Nobody home, partner! RVD rolls out of the way at the last second."
"Van Dam on the move--look out!" Tazz exclaims as a running wheel kick finds Mysterio.
"He's looking to get high for a second time here, Cole! Mysterio's done, I'm telling ya!"
Mr. Pay-Per-View climbs the top rope, makes a dazzling leap halfway across the ring...but Mysterio rolls out of the way. RVD's audible groans precede a dropkick to the back that sends him stumbling onto the middle rope. "Wine me, dine me, 6...1...9 me!" Tazz commentates as the 619 connects for a 2nd time. On the way down, Mysterio is the one that becomes intimate with the unforgiving canvas. Meanwhile, Rob Van Dam has assailed the top rope with staggering speed. Before Mysterio can even realize what is happening, he is sandwiched!
1...2...3.
"Oh my...GOSH, Cole. That match was better than the fireworks!"
"I couldn't agree more, partner. A tremendous way to kick off The Bash!"
************************************
Up next, Chris Masters poses his way down to the ring. The added boost of Stacy Keibler (in her typical fan-approved short skirt that shows off her long legs) at his side is a key factor of his crowd support. She is in a cheerful mood and rubs his washboard abs. Making her own provocative sloooow entrance through the ring ropes, Stacy bends over for the world to see. Masters imposes his way into the ring, clearly not lacking any self-confidence.
The crowd grows even louder as Booker T, one half of the tag team champions, makes his fiery entrance, clearly in the zone as the match ignites with rambunctious action. Booker T's explosive style matches up well against the Masterpiece's power-centered strategy. Despite the massive amount of cheers, the Houston native falls to the Masterlock. Stacy enters the ring, wowing the crowd a 2nd time, as she celebrates with her talent. "I gotta get myself a manager, Cole. Stacy's on fire tonight--whew, baby!"
Momentarily, Cole and Tazz are in a festive mood at ringside after the match. "Well, I'm afraid this is where things take a grim turn, ladies and gentlemen. Take a look."
The video package plays for the Last Man Standing match between Kane and Big Show, as a recap of the former's abusive tactics is shown on the big screen. Outdoing Booker T's entrance, the Big Red (and sickeningly proud) Monster bathes the arena in dark crimson flames, evil music escorting him to the ring as Big Show makes his way out next. The two big men stare each other down and before long, Kane insults the Giant saying he's the "Big Freak." As a result, all hell breaks loose! Big Show is soon busted open again, but it doesn't stop him!
The rage of the giant clashes well against Kane's inherent wickedness. The two big bulls brutalize each other all over the ring, the arena and finally into the stage area. Using his dominant power, the Big Show lifts Kane into a display light. There is a small electric explosion and the crowd gasps. A mountainous growl escapes the giant as he calls for the Show Stopper.
"Oh, gawd, Cole."
"Not off the stage..."
"Look out!"
But Kane reverses it mid-air and both men plummet through tables and other ringside equipment. The crowd is left in a stunned silence as are SmackDown's commentators.
**************************************
After EMT units tend to Big Show (and Kane, had he not fled from their efforts with a noticeable limp), things take a refreshing lighter note as new theme music fills the arena.
"What the hell, Cole? RAW divas at the bash? What gives?"
"I've just received word that these two delightful divas are now exclusive to SmackDown!"
Tony Chimel announces a bikini contest between the two sizzling hot divas. The crowd erupts!
The beauteous blonde Playboy cover girl declares that a bikini contest is the best way to make a debut!
"I'm gonna need new pants, Cole!"
The crowd can't decide which diva is victorious as they both celebrate together as a compromise. All is joy...until LITA appears on the titantron, calling the divas a pair of hussies.
Boos suddenly respond as Lita's words are nearly drowned out. "Tonight, my man, Edge, is going to be the true victor."
******************************************
"Well, that remains to be seen, ladies and gentlemen. Moving forward, the next encounter may be one that captures the essence of The Bash!"
A video plays for the steel cage match between Kurt Angle & the controversial Muhammad Hassan. Kurt Angle makes his heroic entrance, with the crowd clearly on his side.
Meanwhile, the ominous chamber of steel lowers over the ring. The crowd is squirming in their seats with anticipation. As the match begins, every time Hassan's face meets the steel walls, the crowd heartily approves. Before long, it is clear that Angle is too much for the shameful United States Champion. Hassan's goons try to interfere, but they can't manage to unlock the cage door.
To help them along through their confusion, Batista comes out and beats the crap out of them, letting out his fury. Meanwhile, Angle yanks Hassan (who was trying to escape during the confusion) down from the cage by his...ankle and latches on the crippling submission hold. Hassan is forced to tap out and the referee has to tackle Angle for him to relinquish the hold.
Angle's patriotic theme plays as he raises up the newly earned United States Championship. The crowd is applauding with fervid chants of USA! "Yeah! My man, Angle, getting it done!"
After Angle celebrates in the ring, putting on his gold medals as icing on the cake, the cage has already risen back up and Batista confronts Angle in the ring. The two men pass each other by as the Animal grabs a microphone. He is clearly upset, growling with Teddy Long's name being featured heavily in his angry speech. "I should be competing tonight for the World Heavyweight Championship, not those other two clowns. A cult leader and a brazen punk! So, Teddy, since you're obviously not going to give me what I want, what are you going to do, huh?
"You could at least give me something to pummel tonight."
The GM of SmackDown! makes his way onto the titan-tron, says if Batista is aching for some competition, he has just the right solution. "Just traded from RAW, I give you..."
IT'S - JOHN - CENA!
The crowd is ecstatic one way or another for the controversial former WWE champion from RAW. Batista wins a close one, and even has some fans on his side, as he rakes Cena's eyes and finishes him with a powerbomb. "Well, not quite the welcome John Cena was probably hoping for, but I don't think you can blame the Animal." Tazz remarks as Batista departs.
***********************************************
The best video package of the night plays for the triple threat main event. The crowd is hot for each combatant, but Edge easily receives the worst reaction, as he slithers his way to the ring with Lita attached to his hip. Around his waist is the coveted prize that both challengers yearn to have with every fiber of their being. The #1 contender Orton looks particularly hungry and batters Edge in the early going, but his attempts are diverted by the Demon from Death Valley. He has a bone to pick (literally) with the two men who cost him the championship.
After interfering once too many, Lita gets chokeslammed by The Undertaker. "That takes care of that, Cole! Ha!"
Randy Orton & Edge, two young commodities, discard The Undertaker and resume their back and forth tussling. Edge's clothesline misses, and he gets powerslammed over the top rope, crashing into Lita on the floor below. The expulsion of Edge allows Undertaker and Orton's heated exchange to repeat last week. The Phenom seizes the 3rd generation superstar by the throat, but this time, Orton refuses, scampering toward the turnbuckle while still in the clutches of the Deadman. He cinches his own arm around the former champion's head and connects with the run-up RKO from the corner. Undertaker splats onto the canvas with a deafening crash, motionless. "Orton just killed the Deadman, Cole! Damn!"
The crowd is left in disbelief. Edge is nowhere to be seen with his championship reign about to meet a short end. But Lita hops onto the apron to distract Orton. He swings, and Lita collapses in fear. Edge sneaks in, wallops Orton from behind with the title belt. The #1 contender tumbles into the ropes, and staggers back around, receiving a spear for the unpopular defeat.
"Lita's words ring true. but how long can edge cheat to stay on top?" Cole commentates, but The Undertaker sits up and scares the crap out of the sniveling champion, who bolts from the ring with his significant other in tow. The show appears to close on The Undertaker as he cuts a finger across his neck and rolls his eyes back as Edge holds up the title belt, but...Orton has recovered and is standing behind the Deadman. He is fuming at the mouth, as red as a cherry, and swings him around, aims the RKO, but is flipped mid-air into a tombstone.
The crowd thunderously applauds as Undertaker poses in the ring, the arena drenched in purple gloom.
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Friday, April 13, 2012
Episode 18 - SmackDown! Before The Bash
The WWE intro plays, followed by:
Welcome to SmackDown! Tensions are fuming with just four days until The Bash this Sunday!
No doubt, Cole. And I gotta tell ya--I'm wondering if some of SmackDown's finest will even be able to put up with each other until then!
We can only hope, partner, as The Bash promises to be a great showing by the #1 brand in sports-entertainment. Take it away, Chimel!
"The following tag team match is scheduled for one fall, and it is for the WWE Tag Team Championship!"
New champs, Booker T & Rob Van Dam, looking sharp with the gold 'round their waists. Got their plate full tonight!
I couldn't agree more, partner. It's apparent that the former champions will be looking to regain what was once theirs.
Despite the bravado shown by Christian & Jericho, the fervid combination of crowd support for the new champions and high energy levels of Booker T & Rob Van Dam prove too great of an obstacle. Christian is knocked out of the ring by Booker T, as RVD gets planted by Jericho, but rolls out of the lionsault. Booker T lurches in and nails the Book-End on the Fozzy frontman. Meanwhile, Mr. Thursday Night launches himself over the top rope at Captain Charisma as the referee counts Jericho's shoulders.
Well, you can't fault the effort of Jericho & Christian.
Not for nothing, Cole. But it's clear the new champs like being on top.
Booker T and Rob Van Dam, two immense fan favorites, celebrate warmly with the audience as the cameras swivel backstage. Naughtily, the camera chases up a pair of long, long legs and zooms in for a tantalizing view of a woman's backside, minimally clothed by daisy dukes and a belt to die for. "Who's this, Cole? Getting hot under the collar here…" The click-clack of her heels can be heard as a delicate hand pats on the locker room door. "Howdy, boys." As if the voice weren't telling enough, the camera finally grants the viewers at home the gorgeous face of Stacy Keibler. The handful of superstars are melted over with amorous smiles as Stacy's pearly white teeth shine.
"How's it going?" She asks, and receives a few stammered responses. "Hey, big man…" She eyes Chris Masters. He points at his chest. "Yeah, you. C'mere." The boys heckle the Masterpiece as he blushes and flexes at the same time, muting some of the catcalls as he approaches the gorgeous leggy blonde. "Yeah?" On-camera, behind Stacy and Chris as they leave the dressing room, is Carlito, who is chewing on an apple and following behind them.
"I might be new to SmackDown. But I've seen more than enough…" She is gawking at the man's impressive muscles. "To notice you're the next big thing." Masters smiles with confidence, absorbing the compliment. "But." Stacy's glossy lips shimmer sexily as she holds up a finger. Masters perks an eyebrow, as does Carlito behind them. "You need…something…else. An extra little something to win over the crowd." Masters shrugs, entertaining the idea and liking the imagery his presumptions are leading him to. "If you're game, I wouldn't mind lending my talents at ringside for you tonight." Masters grins from ear to ear, blatantly accepting the offer, but Carlito blurts out. "You're serious?"
Finally, the breathtaking diva and the bustling Masterpiece discover the Puerto Rican loudmouth, sporting his afro as his mouth hangs open in cool haughtiness. "Cause if you're handing out favors, I wouldn't mind some of those talents either." He raises a wicked eyebrow and Masters tenses. "Easy, big boy." Stacy intervenes, placing her smooth manicured fingers on the Masterpiece's massive chest. "What did you say?" She asks Carlito, whose ego shrivels before the bodacious blonde. He stammers as the diva's evocative stare rips apart the fiber of his entire being. "I was just--you know--saying that I need some help getting to the--the next level--on, uh, on SmackDown, you know?"
"Hmm." Stacy cutely ponders, teasing the big-haired rambler. "We'll see. But first, Chris has a match against Kurt Angle." Carlito nods, thankful for even being spoken to by such an angel, but the cold stare from the Masterpiece crushes the Puerto Rican even more. In that match alluded to by Miss Keibler, the audience would nearly faint as near fall after near fall evolved into a spectacular contest. A new liveliness emerged inside of Chris Masters as Stacy's encouraging chants at ringside egged him on. But the Olympic Hero is no walk in the park. He takes the refueled Masterpiece to his utmost limits before cinching in the ankle lock on the larger superstar. But Stacy Keibler bounces up onto the apron and blows a kiss to Angle, who is looking straight at her. The momentary distraction, though Angle merely shook his head in confusion, proves to be enough for Masters who flips Angle forward. As the Olympic Hero recovers, staggering backward, he is trapped in the Masterlock before any counter can be mounted by the resilient fan favorite. The crowd is littered with some boos, but others are ecstatic because Stacy hops into the ring!
SmackDown's new legs and the Masterpiece celebrate as Angle shakes his head, not liking what happened, but realizing it was mostly a fair outcome. Mostly. "I love it, Cole. Look at those loooong legs. Whoo! No place like SmackDown!, baby!"
***************************************************
After a commercial break, the arena erupts into a fiery doom as Kane makes his haunting entrance. The Big Show is there to meet him moments later, as Cole informs the audience at home that this first blood match was requested personally by the Big Red Monster per approval by Theodore Long, SD!'s General Manager. "From, ah, Miss Keibler to this definite splatterfest. I can't wait, Cole. Big Show ain't a fan of Kane's new shtick." Before long, a steel chair shot threatens to make some red pour out from under Kane's fiery mask. But Kane brutalizes his way back into the contest. As expected, he begins to taunt the world's largest athlete with no remorse or decency. It only angers the giant, who begins to pummel Kane with the chair and even tries to use the steel steps, but is tripped by Kane as the steps slam into his face upon colliding with the floor.
"Look out, Show!" Tazz exclaims at ringside to no avail. Kane cracks him with the chair as soon as he stands up on wobbly legs. The result is blood that Kane aggravates even further, rubbing his boot into Big Show's face. The giant shoves him off, but Kane starts laughing, saying "All of these people…are…laughing at you." Big Show is livid, wiping his wound with his hand, and refuses medical attention. He chases after Kane, but trips, which incites more laughter from some members of the audience.
"Big Show's gonna tear Kane a new one, Cole, I'm telling you."
"Well, personally I'm disgusted by both men's actions tonight."
Rey Mysterio & Eddie Guerrero best Shelton Benjamin and Daivari next, winning with the 619 and Frog Splash. Angle applauds backstage, despite his loss earlier. Once Hassan is the only one left standing in the ring, Angle appears on the titantron. "I love seeing trash put in its proper place. I'll see you at The Bash, Hassan. Oh, by the way, General Manager Theodore Long wants me to inform you that if any of your goons try to interfere, tough luck. Because it's going to be…YOU…and…ME, Kurt Angle, the true American Hero and future US champion, in a STEEL...CAGE." The crowd explodes at the surprise disclosure. Hassan and Daivari grimace and continue to incite the crowd more.
In yet another disappointing match for Batista, the antics of new champion Edge & his devious sidearm Lita get the best of him. Edge will have to lick some wounds for The Bash, but Batista is the one left whimpering in the ring. He destroys equipment at ringside and eventually stomps off to the back after security intervenes.
In a WAR, Orton & Undertaker tackle each other, animosity spilling over the threshold between them. A recap of each superstar's surprise attack on the other plays beforehand, ultimately leading up to Orton's attempt for an RKO that looks like a Dudley Dog, bringing back some ECW memories for Tazz at ringside. The Legend Killer steps up the turnbuckle and intends to swing around in mid-air, but the Phenom counters the creative maneuver on the way down, corralling the brazen 3rd generation superstar into a tombstone piledriver for the definitive victory. Undertaker kneels under the purple lights, sending a message that the championship is truly his and is going to go back on his waist.
"That is what we like to call dominance, Cole."
"I couldn't agree more, Tazz. But will that dominance continue when the odds are split into thirds this Sunday at The Bash, live on pay-per-view?"
"We'll find out. Ha!"
"That we will, partner. Thank you, everybody, for tuning in tonight. We'll see you this Sunday!"
Welcome to SmackDown! Tensions are fuming with just four days until The Bash this Sunday!
No doubt, Cole. And I gotta tell ya--I'm wondering if some of SmackDown's finest will even be able to put up with each other until then!
We can only hope, partner, as The Bash promises to be a great showing by the #1 brand in sports-entertainment. Take it away, Chimel!
"The following tag team match is scheduled for one fall, and it is for the WWE Tag Team Championship!"
New champs, Booker T & Rob Van Dam, looking sharp with the gold 'round their waists. Got their plate full tonight!
I couldn't agree more, partner. It's apparent that the former champions will be looking to regain what was once theirs.
Despite the bravado shown by Christian & Jericho, the fervid combination of crowd support for the new champions and high energy levels of Booker T & Rob Van Dam prove too great of an obstacle. Christian is knocked out of the ring by Booker T, as RVD gets planted by Jericho, but rolls out of the lionsault. Booker T lurches in and nails the Book-End on the Fozzy frontman. Meanwhile, Mr. Thursday Night launches himself over the top rope at Captain Charisma as the referee counts Jericho's shoulders.
Well, you can't fault the effort of Jericho & Christian.
Not for nothing, Cole. But it's clear the new champs like being on top.
Booker T and Rob Van Dam, two immense fan favorites, celebrate warmly with the audience as the cameras swivel backstage. Naughtily, the camera chases up a pair of long, long legs and zooms in for a tantalizing view of a woman's backside, minimally clothed by daisy dukes and a belt to die for. "Who's this, Cole? Getting hot under the collar here…" The click-clack of her heels can be heard as a delicate hand pats on the locker room door. "Howdy, boys." As if the voice weren't telling enough, the camera finally grants the viewers at home the gorgeous face of Stacy Keibler. The handful of superstars are melted over with amorous smiles as Stacy's pearly white teeth shine.
"How's it going?" She asks, and receives a few stammered responses. "Hey, big man…" She eyes Chris Masters. He points at his chest. "Yeah, you. C'mere." The boys heckle the Masterpiece as he blushes and flexes at the same time, muting some of the catcalls as he approaches the gorgeous leggy blonde. "Yeah?" On-camera, behind Stacy and Chris as they leave the dressing room, is Carlito, who is chewing on an apple and following behind them.
"I might be new to SmackDown. But I've seen more than enough…" She is gawking at the man's impressive muscles. "To notice you're the next big thing." Masters smiles with confidence, absorbing the compliment. "But." Stacy's glossy lips shimmer sexily as she holds up a finger. Masters perks an eyebrow, as does Carlito behind them. "You need…something…else. An extra little something to win over the crowd." Masters shrugs, entertaining the idea and liking the imagery his presumptions are leading him to. "If you're game, I wouldn't mind lending my talents at ringside for you tonight." Masters grins from ear to ear, blatantly accepting the offer, but Carlito blurts out. "You're serious?"
Finally, the breathtaking diva and the bustling Masterpiece discover the Puerto Rican loudmouth, sporting his afro as his mouth hangs open in cool haughtiness. "Cause if you're handing out favors, I wouldn't mind some of those talents either." He raises a wicked eyebrow and Masters tenses. "Easy, big boy." Stacy intervenes, placing her smooth manicured fingers on the Masterpiece's massive chest. "What did you say?" She asks Carlito, whose ego shrivels before the bodacious blonde. He stammers as the diva's evocative stare rips apart the fiber of his entire being. "I was just--you know--saying that I need some help getting to the--the next level--on, uh, on SmackDown, you know?"
"Hmm." Stacy cutely ponders, teasing the big-haired rambler. "We'll see. But first, Chris has a match against Kurt Angle." Carlito nods, thankful for even being spoken to by such an angel, but the cold stare from the Masterpiece crushes the Puerto Rican even more. In that match alluded to by Miss Keibler, the audience would nearly faint as near fall after near fall evolved into a spectacular contest. A new liveliness emerged inside of Chris Masters as Stacy's encouraging chants at ringside egged him on. But the Olympic Hero is no walk in the park. He takes the refueled Masterpiece to his utmost limits before cinching in the ankle lock on the larger superstar. But Stacy Keibler bounces up onto the apron and blows a kiss to Angle, who is looking straight at her. The momentary distraction, though Angle merely shook his head in confusion, proves to be enough for Masters who flips Angle forward. As the Olympic Hero recovers, staggering backward, he is trapped in the Masterlock before any counter can be mounted by the resilient fan favorite. The crowd is littered with some boos, but others are ecstatic because Stacy hops into the ring!
SmackDown's new legs and the Masterpiece celebrate as Angle shakes his head, not liking what happened, but realizing it was mostly a fair outcome. Mostly. "I love it, Cole. Look at those loooong legs. Whoo! No place like SmackDown!, baby!"
***************************************************
After a commercial break, the arena erupts into a fiery doom as Kane makes his haunting entrance. The Big Show is there to meet him moments later, as Cole informs the audience at home that this first blood match was requested personally by the Big Red Monster per approval by Theodore Long, SD!'s General Manager. "From, ah, Miss Keibler to this definite splatterfest. I can't wait, Cole. Big Show ain't a fan of Kane's new shtick." Before long, a steel chair shot threatens to make some red pour out from under Kane's fiery mask. But Kane brutalizes his way back into the contest. As expected, he begins to taunt the world's largest athlete with no remorse or decency. It only angers the giant, who begins to pummel Kane with the chair and even tries to use the steel steps, but is tripped by Kane as the steps slam into his face upon colliding with the floor.
"Look out, Show!" Tazz exclaims at ringside to no avail. Kane cracks him with the chair as soon as he stands up on wobbly legs. The result is blood that Kane aggravates even further, rubbing his boot into Big Show's face. The giant shoves him off, but Kane starts laughing, saying "All of these people…are…laughing at you." Big Show is livid, wiping his wound with his hand, and refuses medical attention. He chases after Kane, but trips, which incites more laughter from some members of the audience.
"Big Show's gonna tear Kane a new one, Cole, I'm telling you."
"Well, personally I'm disgusted by both men's actions tonight."
Rey Mysterio & Eddie Guerrero best Shelton Benjamin and Daivari next, winning with the 619 and Frog Splash. Angle applauds backstage, despite his loss earlier. Once Hassan is the only one left standing in the ring, Angle appears on the titantron. "I love seeing trash put in its proper place. I'll see you at The Bash, Hassan. Oh, by the way, General Manager Theodore Long wants me to inform you that if any of your goons try to interfere, tough luck. Because it's going to be…YOU…and…ME, Kurt Angle, the true American Hero and future US champion, in a STEEL...CAGE." The crowd explodes at the surprise disclosure. Hassan and Daivari grimace and continue to incite the crowd more.
In yet another disappointing match for Batista, the antics of new champion Edge & his devious sidearm Lita get the best of him. Edge will have to lick some wounds for The Bash, but Batista is the one left whimpering in the ring. He destroys equipment at ringside and eventually stomps off to the back after security intervenes.
In a WAR, Orton & Undertaker tackle each other, animosity spilling over the threshold between them. A recap of each superstar's surprise attack on the other plays beforehand, ultimately leading up to Orton's attempt for an RKO that looks like a Dudley Dog, bringing back some ECW memories for Tazz at ringside. The Legend Killer steps up the turnbuckle and intends to swing around in mid-air, but the Phenom counters the creative maneuver on the way down, corralling the brazen 3rd generation superstar into a tombstone piledriver for the definitive victory. Undertaker kneels under the purple lights, sending a message that the championship is truly his and is going to go back on his waist.
"That is what we like to call dominance, Cole."
"I couldn't agree more, Tazz. But will that dominance continue when the odds are split into thirds this Sunday at The Bash, live on pay-per-view?"
"We'll find out. Ha!"
"That we will, partner. Thank you, everybody, for tuning in tonight. We'll see you this Sunday!"
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Episode 17 - Aftermath
After the WWE intro:
Unlike usual, there is no festive greeting by Michael Cole as the camera pans the crowd.
Because Edge is the in the ring with Lita, gloating about his cunning victory.
The gold World Heavyweight Championship is resting over his shoulder.
The crowd instantly hates him, having gained no new fans since jumping from RAW. The Rated R Superstar can't torture the crowd with self-praise for long because Theodore Long emerges and makes a rematch for the title.
But Edge blatantly low blows The Undertaker, which ends the match by DQ. Afterward, the SmackDown! General Manager isn't convinced and neither is Orton or Batista, who make their way down to the ring. They all want a piece of the gold and plead their respective cases to the GM.
"At The Bash, I'm making a triple threat match for the World Heavyweight Championship between the new champion, Edge, the #1 contender, Randy Orton, and...the former champion, The Undertaker." The crowd approves but Batista clearly doesn't and neither does Orton. Each argues the decision but Long's judgment is final.
****************************************
After his crushing defeat at the hands of the Big Show, Rey Mysterio is back in shape against Rob Van Dam, in a ladder match for the Cruiserweight Championship, which winds up being quite a treat for the fans. Mysterio wins!
"New Cruiserweight Champ, Cole! Mysterio did it!"
"The two prideful combatants exchanging mutual respect..."
Backstage, Benjamin scoffs at Mysterio's victory, watching the program on a monitor, as he bumps heads with Christian. "What are you looking at?"
"I might ask you the same thing. What's the matter, don't like being proven wrong by Mysterio? That makes, what, two weeks in a row now that you've eaten your words? How's the ankle?"
"And who are you?" Benjamin defensively objects. "Last I saw, you gave up the Tag Team Championship to Mysterio's opponent tonight." He coldly bites back.
Christian smirks with a wry chuckle. "You know what, Benjamin? I think the Peeps would like it if I taught you a lesson tonight on who the true Gold Standard is."
"Peeps? What are you, Captain Canary now? You're on, chump."
Meanwhile...
The arena has fallen under a crimson shroud. It's Kane. He's back.
AND HE'S WEARING A MASK!
"Last week on SmackDown!, the Big Show made his debut." Kane foully growls to the audience behind the guise of a new fiery red mask. "What a freak. Smiling at all of you... pretending a hideous giant fits in with normal people. And what makes me SICK is how you people cheer him on, making him believe he's not a monster. Well, at least I have accepted what I truly am."
"It seems the attacks from Muhammad Hassan long ago have snapped something alive inside of Kane." Cole speculates, followed by Tazz. "What the hell happened to Kane since he went to RAW, Cole? Sheesh!"
Big Show comes out, clearly upset, saying, "This freak is going to cinch his giant-sized fingers around your neck and chokeslam your ass back to hell!" The crowd approves and Kane merely laughs from behind his mask, tightening his glove.
The bell rings, and before long, Kane's taunting starts to take effect on the giant. While he's beating on Kane in the corner, he gets disqualified for not heeding the referee's warnings. In a sudden outburst, the Big Show snaps and chokeslams referee Charles Robinson. The crowd heavily boos and Big Show shouts at them. In the heat of the moment, Kane has slithered out of the ring, laughing as he retreats.
**********************************
Fresh off his tag team victory with RVD, Booker T is excited backstage with his partner about the opportunity he has tonight to win more gold in the US title. He is bummed that RVD lost his match against Mysterio, but is given a wish for good luck by Mr. Thursday Night all the same.
...GO!...
The Peeps have leaped into existence as Christian makes his way to the ring, followed shortly by Shelton Benjamin's ego, along with the blond-headed superstar. In a competitive match, Christian catches Benjamin's foot mid-super kick, spins him around for the Killswitch, but gets shoved off into the ropes. On the rebound, Benjamin snares him for the t-bone suplex that seals an impressive showing by the auspicious, albeit arrogant superstar. The Peeps have vanished.
In the ring, only Hassan & Daivari have the self-righteous nerve to blather on about how they're the pure choice for United States Champion and will one day rise to even higher peaks of greatness, that the audience or WWE itself won't be able to stop them from doing so. The scorn from the audience nearly drowns out their words and the WWE Universe is spared by Booker T's entrance.
"Thank god, Cole. Here comes the next US Champion..."
"That has yet to be seen, partner, though honestly I wouldn't mind it."
Hassan soils everyone's dream, however, but Kurt Angle (still hot off his loss to The Undertaker) shows up and easily disposes of Daivari (who helped Hassan win by hitting Booker T with the title belt). "You're a disgrace to that belt, Hassan!" Kurt calls out the cowering champion, who has retreated up the ramp with a wounded Daivari. "I'm a real US champion! Enjoy that belt while you can. Because at The Bash, it's going to be mine!"
********************************
The main event for tonight's show has rocketed into place. The crowd negatively welcomes Randy Orton, one of the culprits behind the end of Undertaker's title reign, and gives a slightly warmer response to Batista, though the Animal could not be less concerned with them. The crowd easily favors the third man that enters the arena.
In a star-studded affair, the Legend Killer and the Animal tussle again, but are smacked into next week by the Brahma Bull. After an RKO goes awry and sends Orton crashing outside of the ring, Batista gets planted by a spinebuster. The People want their favorite Elbow Drop, but the Animal powers back up to his feet.
"Right back at ya, Rock! Ha!" Tazz comments as the Animal plants the Great One and shakes the ropes, the arena falling into utter turbulence. He preps the Batista Bomb, dragging the flattened People's Champion back up to his feet, but The Rock counters, flipping the bigger man onto his back. Blinded by fury, Batista races forward with a deathly clothesline, but is sprung off his own feet for a thunderous Rock Bottom!
The applause of the people shatters the sound barrier as their champion wins.
"What a great comeback win for The Rock!" Cole announces. Orton is seen favoring a sore shoulder after tumbling out of the ring. Instead of engaging the victor, the #1 contender retreats, sorely nodding his head.
But...
As Orton backs up the ramp, he is greeted by The Undertaker, whose hulking frame collides into the Legend Killer from behind. Before Orton can respond, he is powerlessly seized by a dragon sleeper. Struggling for breath, Orton is choked out.
"Payback's a bitch, Cole! Orton's counting sheep!"
"A foul warning of things to come from the Phenom, partner..."
Thunder crackles as Undertaker rolls back his eyes and runs his thumb over his throat as he demonically gazes down at the unconscious louse.
Unlike usual, there is no festive greeting by Michael Cole as the camera pans the crowd.
Because Edge is the in the ring with Lita, gloating about his cunning victory.
The gold World Heavyweight Championship is resting over his shoulder.
The crowd instantly hates him, having gained no new fans since jumping from RAW. The Rated R Superstar can't torture the crowd with self-praise for long because Theodore Long emerges and makes a rematch for the title.
But Edge blatantly low blows The Undertaker, which ends the match by DQ. Afterward, the SmackDown! General Manager isn't convinced and neither is Orton or Batista, who make their way down to the ring. They all want a piece of the gold and plead their respective cases to the GM.
"At The Bash, I'm making a triple threat match for the World Heavyweight Championship between the new champion, Edge, the #1 contender, Randy Orton, and...the former champion, The Undertaker." The crowd approves but Batista clearly doesn't and neither does Orton. Each argues the decision but Long's judgment is final.
****************************************
After his crushing defeat at the hands of the Big Show, Rey Mysterio is back in shape against Rob Van Dam, in a ladder match for the Cruiserweight Championship, which winds up being quite a treat for the fans. Mysterio wins!
"New Cruiserweight Champ, Cole! Mysterio did it!"
"The two prideful combatants exchanging mutual respect..."
Backstage, Benjamin scoffs at Mysterio's victory, watching the program on a monitor, as he bumps heads with Christian. "What are you looking at?"
"I might ask you the same thing. What's the matter, don't like being proven wrong by Mysterio? That makes, what, two weeks in a row now that you've eaten your words? How's the ankle?"
"And who are you?" Benjamin defensively objects. "Last I saw, you gave up the Tag Team Championship to Mysterio's opponent tonight." He coldly bites back.
Christian smirks with a wry chuckle. "You know what, Benjamin? I think the Peeps would like it if I taught you a lesson tonight on who the true Gold Standard is."
"Peeps? What are you, Captain Canary now? You're on, chump."
Meanwhile...
The arena has fallen under a crimson shroud. It's Kane. He's back.
AND HE'S WEARING A MASK!
"Last week on SmackDown!, the Big Show made his debut." Kane foully growls to the audience behind the guise of a new fiery red mask. "What a freak. Smiling at all of you... pretending a hideous giant fits in with normal people. And what makes me SICK is how you people cheer him on, making him believe he's not a monster. Well, at least I have accepted what I truly am."
"It seems the attacks from Muhammad Hassan long ago have snapped something alive inside of Kane." Cole speculates, followed by Tazz. "What the hell happened to Kane since he went to RAW, Cole? Sheesh!"
Big Show comes out, clearly upset, saying, "This freak is going to cinch his giant-sized fingers around your neck and chokeslam your ass back to hell!" The crowd approves and Kane merely laughs from behind his mask, tightening his glove.
The bell rings, and before long, Kane's taunting starts to take effect on the giant. While he's beating on Kane in the corner, he gets disqualified for not heeding the referee's warnings. In a sudden outburst, the Big Show snaps and chokeslams referee Charles Robinson. The crowd heavily boos and Big Show shouts at them. In the heat of the moment, Kane has slithered out of the ring, laughing as he retreats.
**********************************
Fresh off his tag team victory with RVD, Booker T is excited backstage with his partner about the opportunity he has tonight to win more gold in the US title. He is bummed that RVD lost his match against Mysterio, but is given a wish for good luck by Mr. Thursday Night all the same.
...GO!...
The Peeps have leaped into existence as Christian makes his way to the ring, followed shortly by Shelton Benjamin's ego, along with the blond-headed superstar. In a competitive match, Christian catches Benjamin's foot mid-super kick, spins him around for the Killswitch, but gets shoved off into the ropes. On the rebound, Benjamin snares him for the t-bone suplex that seals an impressive showing by the auspicious, albeit arrogant superstar. The Peeps have vanished.
In the ring, only Hassan & Daivari have the self-righteous nerve to blather on about how they're the pure choice for United States Champion and will one day rise to even higher peaks of greatness, that the audience or WWE itself won't be able to stop them from doing so. The scorn from the audience nearly drowns out their words and the WWE Universe is spared by Booker T's entrance.
"Thank god, Cole. Here comes the next US Champion..."
"That has yet to be seen, partner, though honestly I wouldn't mind it."
Hassan soils everyone's dream, however, but Kurt Angle (still hot off his loss to The Undertaker) shows up and easily disposes of Daivari (who helped Hassan win by hitting Booker T with the title belt). "You're a disgrace to that belt, Hassan!" Kurt calls out the cowering champion, who has retreated up the ramp with a wounded Daivari. "I'm a real US champion! Enjoy that belt while you can. Because at The Bash, it's going to be mine!"
********************************
The main event for tonight's show has rocketed into place. The crowd negatively welcomes Randy Orton, one of the culprits behind the end of Undertaker's title reign, and gives a slightly warmer response to Batista, though the Animal could not be less concerned with them. The crowd easily favors the third man that enters the arena.
In a star-studded affair, the Legend Killer and the Animal tussle again, but are smacked into next week by the Brahma Bull. After an RKO goes awry and sends Orton crashing outside of the ring, Batista gets planted by a spinebuster. The People want their favorite Elbow Drop, but the Animal powers back up to his feet.
"Right back at ya, Rock! Ha!" Tazz comments as the Animal plants the Great One and shakes the ropes, the arena falling into utter turbulence. He preps the Batista Bomb, dragging the flattened People's Champion back up to his feet, but The Rock counters, flipping the bigger man onto his back. Blinded by fury, Batista races forward with a deathly clothesline, but is sprung off his own feet for a thunderous Rock Bottom!
The applause of the people shatters the sound barrier as their champion wins.
"What a great comeback win for The Rock!" Cole announces. Orton is seen favoring a sore shoulder after tumbling out of the ring. Instead of engaging the victor, the #1 contender retreats, sorely nodding his head.
But...
As Orton backs up the ramp, he is greeted by The Undertaker, whose hulking frame collides into the Legend Killer from behind. Before Orton can respond, he is powerlessly seized by a dragon sleeper. Struggling for breath, Orton is choked out.
"Payback's a bitch, Cole! Orton's counting sheep!"
"A foul warning of things to come from the Phenom, partner..."
Thunder crackles as Undertaker rolls back his eyes and runs his thumb over his throat as he demonically gazes down at the unconscious louse.
Episode 16 - An Unexpected Favor
The WWE intro plays, followed by:
Welcome to SmackDown! The #1 brand in sports-entertainnment!
No doubt, Cole! And SmackDown's going to live up to that honor tonight!
My sentiments exactly, partner! Tonight, we're going to see what promises to be an epic showdown between the People's Champion, The Rock, and the World Heavyweight Champion, the phenomenal Undertaker!
Two words, Cole: Rocket. Buster. I'm tellin' ya! Ha!
"Well, here they come, Tazz, the WWE Tag Team Champions, Christian and Y2J Chris Jericho. A few weeks ago, we saw them clash with their challengers for tonight. And it might've been a dark omen of things to come!" A video shows the victory by Booker T & Rob Van Dam weeks ago when they faced the Tag Team Champions. "Bah, I don't think so, Cole. Christian and Jericho--they know how to get the job done!"
Referee Jack Patton holds up the shimmering silver and blue Tag Team Titles. "That's what it's all about here tonight, Cole. And-- DAMN!" Tazz is cut off as Rob Van Dam drives his foot into the mouth of Chris Jericho to 'kick' off the contest. "RVD literally kicking things off here, Tazz, near fall on Jericho." Tazz agrees, saying, "Van Dam doesn't play around. Back in ECW, he held the TV Title for a whole year!" Cole commends Van Dam's tenacity. "An impressive feat, partner. There is no question that RVD wouldn't mind adding another championship belt to his present collection." Cole is referring to the Cruiserweight Championship, that waits at ringside for its keeper, as Jericho cockily plants a foot on the chest of Mr. Thursday Night.
"C'mon, baby!" Jericho's foolery amounts to a muscular pose atop Van Dam, who quickly rolls out from beneath his foot. The referee admonishes Jericho, who shoos him away. "I'm the King of the World!" Jericho growls self-assuredly and tags in Christian, who goes to work on Van Dam. After some dirty tactics, Van Dam flips out of the corner and tags in a hot Booker T!
"Book's teaching these two suckas how it really goes down, Cole!"
"Booker T is on fire, chop to Jericho, bet he feels the sting, but Christian--oh! A debilitating reverse DDT by Captain Charisma, planting the rowdy challenger!"
Christian punishes Booker T, who is trying to call upon the crowd to rally back against the champions, who continue to abuse the referee's eyesight (or lack thereof). A tag to Jericho leads to him holding onto the ropes as he applies a very uncomfortable looking abdominal stretch until referee Jack Patton sees it and breaks the hold. Jericho tries to corral the Houston Native, but he scampers to his team's corner and tags in a hot RVD, who plants yet another boot to Jericho's teeth, springboarding off the ropes and spin-kicking Christian to the floor.
Christian returns with the tag team belt in his grasp, trying to mosey in behind Van Dam, while the referee struggles to get Booker T (who's engaged Jericho) out of the ring as the illegal man, but Christian's attempts goes awry as Mr. Thursday Night leaps into the air and kicks the title belt back into Captain Charisma's face. "Oh, the peeps had to feel that one, Cole!"
Meanwhile, Booker T has listened to the referee, but only after planting Jericho with the Book End, which sets him up perfectly for the championship-worthy Five Star Frog Splash!
"What a way to kick off SmackDown! Nobody gets higher than that man right there, Mr. Thursday Night, Rob Van Dam!"
"Let's take a look at the replay, Tazz!" Cole gives commentary throughout the replay as the cameras flash during the huge splash. Meanwhile, the new champions celebrate while the former ones skulk to the back, pushing each other away in disagreement of what went wrong.
************************************************
Batista is hulking over the desk of Theodore Long, SmackDown's GM.
"Come on, Teddy--y'know I deserve a title shot at THE BASH."
"I have to disagree with ya, big man. Orton earned his shot at Super SmackDown."
"You know I had The Undertaker beat that night. If it wasn't for Angle..."
"Maybe so, big man. But I'll tell ya what--tonight, you can take your aggression on Orton."
Batista stares down the General Manager, but slowly backs away with a smirk on his face.
"Thanks, Teddy. A pleasure, as always."
The bell rings. Tony Chimel announces, "The following match is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first..."
Rey Mysterio enters the building to a huge ovation. "Lots of support for the 619 Speed Devil tonight, Cole!"
His opponent, SmackDown's latest trade acquisition from RAW...
WELL...IT'S THE BIG SHOOOOW.
"What?" is the collective reaction. Most of all, Rey Mysterio is shocked at the size disparity of his incoming opponent. The Big Show is stomping his way down to the ring to a moderate reaction from the crowd. "David & Goliath meet again, Cole!" Cole agrees as Big Show looms over the top rope and steps into the ring. Mysterio is itching, but unsure of how to tackle the giant. Eventually, the mountainous acquisition rakes in at Mysterio, big hands trying to yank him into his grasp, but Mysterio slips between his legs. Instinctively, he brilliantly hops off the ropes and leaps backward at Big Show.
"He got caught! Mysterio's done for, I'm tellin' ya!"
"What's Big Show doing here?"
Big Show lifts Mysterio high into the air and tosses him with ease over the top rope. "Crash and burn, courtesy of the Big Show." Mysterio slowly recovers as Big Show motions to the fans for a mixed reaction. The San Diego Sensation crawls back into the squared circle but it's to no avail. Big Show's size and strength are too much. A merciful, yet agonizing Chokeslam puts Mysterio down for the 3 count and then some.
"Your winner of this match, the BIG...SHOW."
************************************************
Back after a commercial break, the cameras dawn upon Eddie Guerrero, who is joking around with a battered Mysterio. "You got squashed, holmes! I've been in your shoes. I tried my hardest to beat him, but, hey, holmes--" Eddie shrugs. "He's a big boy, vato!" Mysterio tries to play along, but his back is feeling the brunt of the injuries after taking on the Big Show.
"I see you guys are laughing it off, but shorty here just got himself whooped in the ring tonight," says a disparaging Shelton Benjamin, ego rising through his blond hair. "See, I ain't too big on giggles and screwing around. I'm all about winning and proving to the WWE Universe that I'm the best in the world and the future of WWE." Eddie and Rey perk an eyebrow. "Eh, is that right, ese?" Eddie jabs back. "I suppose that's why you've been trying so hard to lose lately, huh, cabron?" Shelton tenses and stares a hole through Guerrero.
In the background, though he goes unnoticed by Cole & Tazz is a pensive Kurt Angle, who has to be feeling sour after his tough loss to The Undertaker last week. Meanwhile, to make matters worse, the turban-clad duo of Muhammad Hassan & Khosrow Daivari step up alongside Benjamin. "Yeah, Rey, you gave a nice showing tonight. Almost as nice as when you gave me this..." Hassan points to the United States Championship that is hanging over his shoulder. The smarmy Arab superstar clutches the belt. Before Eddie can voice a comeback...
"Hey." Kurt Angle bluntly enters the heated exchange, obviously in a fierce mood. "Mysterio's no chump. I know from experience." He vouches for the heel's latest target. "I just lost one of the biggest matches of my career. Frankly, I'm still pissed about it. So why do I gotta hear you 3 punks yammer about who's the best? Because if anyone's a chump around here, I'm looking at 'em right now." Angle declares in his nasally voice, staring down Benjamin and Hassan. Daivari shouts something in Arabic but Angle holds up a hand to stop him. "What's that? You're saying Hassan here wants to hand his title over to a real American champion?" The crowd voices a collective "ooh" at the bold statement. Hassan tenses even more and cuts off his manager. Meanwhile, Chris Masters has perked up to listen in on the war of words.
"You don't deserve to face me for this title, Mr. Angle. You're not even qualified. None of you are. But if you want to settle this..."
"What--in the ring? No problem." Mysterio finally speaks up in his gravelly voice, but Eddie steps in front of him. "I got this covered for ya, holmes."
"I'll run circles around you three clowns." Angle accepts the offer, grinning confidently. The Masterpiece steps up, his muscles pumping as he speaks.
"Y'know, Kurt's not the only one that has a problem with you having that championship, Hassan. I wouldn't mind breaking you in half tonight either."
"Sounds good, then, doesn't it?" Shelton Benjamin jumps in. "Because all I see is a has-been, a midget and a beefcake that's all brawn and no brains."
"Yeah, it does." Angle chimes in. "I guess my teachings went in one ear and out the other, Benjamin. After tonight, you won't have a leg to stand on."
"We'll see." Benjamin responds to his former mentor, and Hassan repeats it, followed by Daivari's incoherent rambling as the three men exit the room.
"Oh, man, Cole. This night's getting better by the minute!"
"I don't know, partner. Things might only get worse as the night goes on."
It seems Cole's worry are confirmed as...
BATISTA hulks onto the stage, angry rock music booming throughout the arena. RANDY ORTON enters next and cheats his way to a victory by putting his feet on the ropes. Batista is furious and chases Orton to the backstage area. Orton tries to escape, but comes to blows with the larger superstar. Being overpowered, Batista slams him through an equipment table. "Good luck at The Bash, punk." Batista growls as he stomps away, having no problem with security as referees tend to Orton, who is covered in debris and splintered wood, wincing.
"Well, I think the moral here is to not anger the beast, eh, Cole?"
********************************************************
In the 6 man tag team match, egos are brimming to a breaking point. The technically-studded trio of Masters, Angle & Guerrero clash well with Benjamin's agility, but are overwhelmed by Hassan & Daivari's dirty antics in the early part of the contest. Inevitably, chaos breaks loose, giving referee Nick Patrick too much to deal with. The Angle Slam finds Daivari, who is thrown over the ropes as a result. Meanwhile, Guerrero lands the 3 Amigos on Hassan, who stumbles back up to his feet, only to be lynched by the Masterlock while Benjamin is left to writhe in the Angle Lock.
As the losing trio limp to the back, Angle gestures at Hassan, enviously making a point about how he wants that US Title that still unceremoniously hangs over the Arab's shoulder.
Backstage, The Undertaker is present for a rare interview with Josh Matthews. "Well, first of all, congratulations on your successful title defense last week against Kurt Angle." Matthews commends the Demon of Death Valley in a shaky voice. "Tonight, in a non-title match that is now mere moments away, you are to face the People's Champion, The Rock. What are you feelings?" The Undertaker regards the scrawny interviewer with his fearsome eyes that nearly send Matthews scampering out of his shoes. "The Rock..." He begins in a sinister drawl. "And myself go way back. We've had some disagreements in the past. But tonight?" The Phenom raises an eyebrow as Matthews swallows a lump in his throat. "...It ends." And he leaves.
IF YA SMELL...WHAT THE ROCK...IS COOKIN'!
It's yet another fierce match for The Undertaker, who's had two back-to-back title defenses. Even with the power of darkness, the champion has to be running low on resolve. The Rock is there to beat him down, equally brisk, until a neck-and-neck exchange concludes with a tombstone piledriver after a reversal to the Rock Bottom. "Wow, Cole, what a match. The Deadman said it was going to end tonight, and The Rock went down." Afterward, the champion exchanges nods with the humbled Brahma Bull, who returns to the back, and then drops to one knee, the lights switching to a purple mist as the Demon of Death Valley raises the coveted World Championship in the center of the ring, the organ-laced music chilling the arena.
"That's one scary dude, Cole. Who's going to be able to stop the Dea--"
"W-what--who's that by the turnbuckle?" Cole interrupts, noticing the shrouded figure in the corner as the crowd falls into a clamor.
"No, no, no, who's THAT at ringside, Cole? Don't turn around, champ!"
Suddenly, the lights come back on. The Undertaker turns around, barely able to stand as Edge's shoulder rams into him, slamming him on the mat. The lights dawn upon the blond Rated R Superstar, who's made a name for himself since being traded to RAW, paramountly clear by the briefcase that is being held by Lita, the other one at ringside. Edge is hollering something to the referee, who in turn is shouting something to Tony Chimel. "Edge is cashing in his Money in the Bank briefcase. The following match is scheduled for one fall and it is for the World Heavyweight Championship." Not wasting any time, Edge rushes in on the stunned champion, but the Phenom powers out at the breath of 3. "C'mon, Undertaker!" Cole blurts.
Before long, referee Mike Chioda is leveled by a big boot from The Undertaker. As the champion hesitates for just a moment, Edge prepares a 2nd spear, but is beat to the punch by the #1 contender, Randy Orton, who slips into the ring and RKOs the champion. He pops back up to his feet, glances at the fallen Phenom, and says, "He's all yours. I'll see you at The Bash."
"Not like this--come on!" Cole heatedly disputes.
"What the hell? This ain't right..." Tazz responds.
As Edge clobbers the Deadman with a spear.
Meanwhile, Lita is reviving referee Mike Chioda, who makes a slow, but evident 3 count. "Here is your winner...and NEW...World Heavyweight Champion..."
...ON THIS DAY...
"I can't believe this! That spineless Orton just cost The Undertaker the World Heavyweight Title!" Cole shouts in disgust, as Edge & Lita are brought to tears in celebration.
Welcome to SmackDown! The #1 brand in sports-entertainnment!
No doubt, Cole! And SmackDown's going to live up to that honor tonight!
My sentiments exactly, partner! Tonight, we're going to see what promises to be an epic showdown between the People's Champion, The Rock, and the World Heavyweight Champion, the phenomenal Undertaker!
Two words, Cole: Rocket. Buster. I'm tellin' ya! Ha!
"Well, here they come, Tazz, the WWE Tag Team Champions, Christian and Y2J Chris Jericho. A few weeks ago, we saw them clash with their challengers for tonight. And it might've been a dark omen of things to come!" A video shows the victory by Booker T & Rob Van Dam weeks ago when they faced the Tag Team Champions. "Bah, I don't think so, Cole. Christian and Jericho--they know how to get the job done!"
Referee Jack Patton holds up the shimmering silver and blue Tag Team Titles. "That's what it's all about here tonight, Cole. And-- DAMN!" Tazz is cut off as Rob Van Dam drives his foot into the mouth of Chris Jericho to 'kick' off the contest. "RVD literally kicking things off here, Tazz, near fall on Jericho." Tazz agrees, saying, "Van Dam doesn't play around. Back in ECW, he held the TV Title for a whole year!" Cole commends Van Dam's tenacity. "An impressive feat, partner. There is no question that RVD wouldn't mind adding another championship belt to his present collection." Cole is referring to the Cruiserweight Championship, that waits at ringside for its keeper, as Jericho cockily plants a foot on the chest of Mr. Thursday Night.
"C'mon, baby!" Jericho's foolery amounts to a muscular pose atop Van Dam, who quickly rolls out from beneath his foot. The referee admonishes Jericho, who shoos him away. "I'm the King of the World!" Jericho growls self-assuredly and tags in Christian, who goes to work on Van Dam. After some dirty tactics, Van Dam flips out of the corner and tags in a hot Booker T!
"Book's teaching these two suckas how it really goes down, Cole!"
"Booker T is on fire, chop to Jericho, bet he feels the sting, but Christian--oh! A debilitating reverse DDT by Captain Charisma, planting the rowdy challenger!"
Christian punishes Booker T, who is trying to call upon the crowd to rally back against the champions, who continue to abuse the referee's eyesight (or lack thereof). A tag to Jericho leads to him holding onto the ropes as he applies a very uncomfortable looking abdominal stretch until referee Jack Patton sees it and breaks the hold. Jericho tries to corral the Houston Native, but he scampers to his team's corner and tags in a hot RVD, who plants yet another boot to Jericho's teeth, springboarding off the ropes and spin-kicking Christian to the floor.
Christian returns with the tag team belt in his grasp, trying to mosey in behind Van Dam, while the referee struggles to get Booker T (who's engaged Jericho) out of the ring as the illegal man, but Christian's attempts goes awry as Mr. Thursday Night leaps into the air and kicks the title belt back into Captain Charisma's face. "Oh, the peeps had to feel that one, Cole!"
Meanwhile, Booker T has listened to the referee, but only after planting Jericho with the Book End, which sets him up perfectly for the championship-worthy Five Star Frog Splash!
"What a way to kick off SmackDown! Nobody gets higher than that man right there, Mr. Thursday Night, Rob Van Dam!"
"Let's take a look at the replay, Tazz!" Cole gives commentary throughout the replay as the cameras flash during the huge splash. Meanwhile, the new champions celebrate while the former ones skulk to the back, pushing each other away in disagreement of what went wrong.
************************************************
Batista is hulking over the desk of Theodore Long, SmackDown's GM.
"Come on, Teddy--y'know I deserve a title shot at THE BASH."
"I have to disagree with ya, big man. Orton earned his shot at Super SmackDown."
"You know I had The Undertaker beat that night. If it wasn't for Angle..."
"Maybe so, big man. But I'll tell ya what--tonight, you can take your aggression on Orton."
Batista stares down the General Manager, but slowly backs away with a smirk on his face.
"Thanks, Teddy. A pleasure, as always."
The bell rings. Tony Chimel announces, "The following match is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first..."
Rey Mysterio enters the building to a huge ovation. "Lots of support for the 619 Speed Devil tonight, Cole!"
His opponent, SmackDown's latest trade acquisition from RAW...
WELL...IT'S THE BIG SHOOOOW.
"What?" is the collective reaction. Most of all, Rey Mysterio is shocked at the size disparity of his incoming opponent. The Big Show is stomping his way down to the ring to a moderate reaction from the crowd. "David & Goliath meet again, Cole!" Cole agrees as Big Show looms over the top rope and steps into the ring. Mysterio is itching, but unsure of how to tackle the giant. Eventually, the mountainous acquisition rakes in at Mysterio, big hands trying to yank him into his grasp, but Mysterio slips between his legs. Instinctively, he brilliantly hops off the ropes and leaps backward at Big Show.
"He got caught! Mysterio's done for, I'm tellin' ya!"
"What's Big Show doing here?"
Big Show lifts Mysterio high into the air and tosses him with ease over the top rope. "Crash and burn, courtesy of the Big Show." Mysterio slowly recovers as Big Show motions to the fans for a mixed reaction. The San Diego Sensation crawls back into the squared circle but it's to no avail. Big Show's size and strength are too much. A merciful, yet agonizing Chokeslam puts Mysterio down for the 3 count and then some.
"Your winner of this match, the BIG...SHOW."
************************************************
Back after a commercial break, the cameras dawn upon Eddie Guerrero, who is joking around with a battered Mysterio. "You got squashed, holmes! I've been in your shoes. I tried my hardest to beat him, but, hey, holmes--" Eddie shrugs. "He's a big boy, vato!" Mysterio tries to play along, but his back is feeling the brunt of the injuries after taking on the Big Show.
"I see you guys are laughing it off, but shorty here just got himself whooped in the ring tonight," says a disparaging Shelton Benjamin, ego rising through his blond hair. "See, I ain't too big on giggles and screwing around. I'm all about winning and proving to the WWE Universe that I'm the best in the world and the future of WWE." Eddie and Rey perk an eyebrow. "Eh, is that right, ese?" Eddie jabs back. "I suppose that's why you've been trying so hard to lose lately, huh, cabron?" Shelton tenses and stares a hole through Guerrero.
In the background, though he goes unnoticed by Cole & Tazz is a pensive Kurt Angle, who has to be feeling sour after his tough loss to The Undertaker last week. Meanwhile, to make matters worse, the turban-clad duo of Muhammad Hassan & Khosrow Daivari step up alongside Benjamin. "Yeah, Rey, you gave a nice showing tonight. Almost as nice as when you gave me this..." Hassan points to the United States Championship that is hanging over his shoulder. The smarmy Arab superstar clutches the belt. Before Eddie can voice a comeback...
"Hey." Kurt Angle bluntly enters the heated exchange, obviously in a fierce mood. "Mysterio's no chump. I know from experience." He vouches for the heel's latest target. "I just lost one of the biggest matches of my career. Frankly, I'm still pissed about it. So why do I gotta hear you 3 punks yammer about who's the best? Because if anyone's a chump around here, I'm looking at 'em right now." Angle declares in his nasally voice, staring down Benjamin and Hassan. Daivari shouts something in Arabic but Angle holds up a hand to stop him. "What's that? You're saying Hassan here wants to hand his title over to a real American champion?" The crowd voices a collective "ooh" at the bold statement. Hassan tenses even more and cuts off his manager. Meanwhile, Chris Masters has perked up to listen in on the war of words.
"You don't deserve to face me for this title, Mr. Angle. You're not even qualified. None of you are. But if you want to settle this..."
"What--in the ring? No problem." Mysterio finally speaks up in his gravelly voice, but Eddie steps in front of him. "I got this covered for ya, holmes."
"I'll run circles around you three clowns." Angle accepts the offer, grinning confidently. The Masterpiece steps up, his muscles pumping as he speaks.
"Y'know, Kurt's not the only one that has a problem with you having that championship, Hassan. I wouldn't mind breaking you in half tonight either."
"Sounds good, then, doesn't it?" Shelton Benjamin jumps in. "Because all I see is a has-been, a midget and a beefcake that's all brawn and no brains."
"Yeah, it does." Angle chimes in. "I guess my teachings went in one ear and out the other, Benjamin. After tonight, you won't have a leg to stand on."
"We'll see." Benjamin responds to his former mentor, and Hassan repeats it, followed by Daivari's incoherent rambling as the three men exit the room.
"Oh, man, Cole. This night's getting better by the minute!"
"I don't know, partner. Things might only get worse as the night goes on."
It seems Cole's worry are confirmed as...
BATISTA hulks onto the stage, angry rock music booming throughout the arena. RANDY ORTON enters next and cheats his way to a victory by putting his feet on the ropes. Batista is furious and chases Orton to the backstage area. Orton tries to escape, but comes to blows with the larger superstar. Being overpowered, Batista slams him through an equipment table. "Good luck at The Bash, punk." Batista growls as he stomps away, having no problem with security as referees tend to Orton, who is covered in debris and splintered wood, wincing.
"Well, I think the moral here is to not anger the beast, eh, Cole?"
********************************************************
In the 6 man tag team match, egos are brimming to a breaking point. The technically-studded trio of Masters, Angle & Guerrero clash well with Benjamin's agility, but are overwhelmed by Hassan & Daivari's dirty antics in the early part of the contest. Inevitably, chaos breaks loose, giving referee Nick Patrick too much to deal with. The Angle Slam finds Daivari, who is thrown over the ropes as a result. Meanwhile, Guerrero lands the 3 Amigos on Hassan, who stumbles back up to his feet, only to be lynched by the Masterlock while Benjamin is left to writhe in the Angle Lock.
As the losing trio limp to the back, Angle gestures at Hassan, enviously making a point about how he wants that US Title that still unceremoniously hangs over the Arab's shoulder.
Backstage, The Undertaker is present for a rare interview with Josh Matthews. "Well, first of all, congratulations on your successful title defense last week against Kurt Angle." Matthews commends the Demon of Death Valley in a shaky voice. "Tonight, in a non-title match that is now mere moments away, you are to face the People's Champion, The Rock. What are you feelings?" The Undertaker regards the scrawny interviewer with his fearsome eyes that nearly send Matthews scampering out of his shoes. "The Rock..." He begins in a sinister drawl. "And myself go way back. We've had some disagreements in the past. But tonight?" The Phenom raises an eyebrow as Matthews swallows a lump in his throat. "...It ends." And he leaves.
IF YA SMELL...WHAT THE ROCK...IS COOKIN'!
It's yet another fierce match for The Undertaker, who's had two back-to-back title defenses. Even with the power of darkness, the champion has to be running low on resolve. The Rock is there to beat him down, equally brisk, until a neck-and-neck exchange concludes with a tombstone piledriver after a reversal to the Rock Bottom. "Wow, Cole, what a match. The Deadman said it was going to end tonight, and The Rock went down." Afterward, the champion exchanges nods with the humbled Brahma Bull, who returns to the back, and then drops to one knee, the lights switching to a purple mist as the Demon of Death Valley raises the coveted World Championship in the center of the ring, the organ-laced music chilling the arena.
"That's one scary dude, Cole. Who's going to be able to stop the Dea--"
"W-what--who's that by the turnbuckle?" Cole interrupts, noticing the shrouded figure in the corner as the crowd falls into a clamor.
"No, no, no, who's THAT at ringside, Cole? Don't turn around, champ!"
Suddenly, the lights come back on. The Undertaker turns around, barely able to stand as Edge's shoulder rams into him, slamming him on the mat. The lights dawn upon the blond Rated R Superstar, who's made a name for himself since being traded to RAW, paramountly clear by the briefcase that is being held by Lita, the other one at ringside. Edge is hollering something to the referee, who in turn is shouting something to Tony Chimel. "Edge is cashing in his Money in the Bank briefcase. The following match is scheduled for one fall and it is for the World Heavyweight Championship." Not wasting any time, Edge rushes in on the stunned champion, but the Phenom powers out at the breath of 3. "C'mon, Undertaker!" Cole blurts.
Before long, referee Mike Chioda is leveled by a big boot from The Undertaker. As the champion hesitates for just a moment, Edge prepares a 2nd spear, but is beat to the punch by the #1 contender, Randy Orton, who slips into the ring and RKOs the champion. He pops back up to his feet, glances at the fallen Phenom, and says, "He's all yours. I'll see you at The Bash."
"Not like this--come on!" Cole heatedly disputes.
"What the hell? This ain't right..." Tazz responds.
As Edge clobbers the Deadman with a spear.
Meanwhile, Lita is reviving referee Mike Chioda, who makes a slow, but evident 3 count. "Here is your winner...and NEW...World Heavyweight Champion..."
...ON THIS DAY...
"I can't believe this! That spineless Orton just cost The Undertaker the World Heavyweight Title!" Cole shouts in disgust, as Edge & Lita are brought to tears in celebration.
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Episode 15
The WWE intro plays, followed by:
Welcome to SmackDown! The WWE Universe is elecccctric tonight!
The bell rings, appeasing the eager fans. It's Chris Masters versus William Regal. The brawler from Black Pool, England confirms the moniker. Punches here, a t-bone suplex there, as he outmaneuvers Masters with his chain wrestling skills. But the sheer might of the Masterpiece endures and subdues the pugnacious Brit, wrapping him up for the submission victory.
"The Masterpiece using that awesome power to put down a feisty Regal."
"Thanks, Captain Obvious. But give it up to Regal. Masterpiece was taken to the limit here tonight!"
"Well, ladies and gentlemen, Teddy Long has approved what is sure to be an exciting if not brutal contest."
A graphic plays, displaying an elimination style tag team tables match between Daivari, Hassan, Orton & Mysterio, Van Dam & The Rock!
"Some ECW flavor tonight, Cole. I'm liking this! Good move by T-Lo tonight. Should be a rocket-buster."
"And even more importantly, after last week's dazzling triple threat match on Super SmackDown! 2, Kurt Angle and The Undertaker have agreed on a rematch."
A second graphic shows a Falls Count Anywhere contest for the coveted World Heavyweight Championship. "We've received word that the animal, Batista, tried to request a total rematch, but was denied by SmackDown! General Manager, Theodore Long."
"I'm sure Batista don't like being turned down, but props to the GM for having the gall to refuse that monster."
The ring bell clangs again.
"Can you dig it, SUCKA?!"
The crowd ignites for the lively Houston native as Booker T makes his way down to the ring, the stage still puffing out balls of flame as a determined look fills his eyes. "Book's in the zone tonight, Cole." Cole describes how Chris Jericho cheated to beat the Spin-a-Rooni Showman last week alongside footage of the incident. But the pompous rock star isn't concerned.
Jericho strolls down to the ring, pompous as always, self-proclaimed king of the world.
But Booker T is. And it shows. He's one step ahead of Jericho at every turn. A neat sunset flip from the corner nearly overcomes the Canadian Egotist. But Jericho rallies back, putting on a spectacle of technical wrestling. Booker T soon finds himself imprisoned in the Lion Tamer. "The pain HAS to be excruciating, Tazz!" But the crowd fuels Booker T on and helps him reach the ropes before the pain wins. High on adrenaline, Booker T is riding a wave of electricity, shocking Jericho at every turn once again. He rolls up to his feet as Jericho preps another Lionsault. As Jericho lands back down, rattled and stumbling backward, his head is still ducked as Booker T's scissors kick comes crashing down for the 1...2...3, with the cameras flashing within the crowd.
*********************************************************
"......GO!......."
"Here comes Christian, one half of the WWE Tag Team Champions."
"Who's he gesturing to, Cole? I d-don't get it!"
"C'mon, Tazz. Y'know as well as I do, that Christian is signaling to all of his 'peeps'."
"Right..."
"AIN'T NO STOPPING ME NOW!"
Shelton Benjamin makes his way onto the stage, followed by Carlito, all three men hearing boos from the crowd as the triple threat spectacle commences!
"Look out here...OH! What a clothesline by Captain Charisma. Knocked Carlito on his ass!"
Just as Christian levels the boastful superstar with that clothesline, Shelton Benjamin soars through the air from the top rope, spring-boarding into Christian, who is unaware of the devastating hit that easily outdoes his own clothesline! "Where the hell did Benjamin come from? This is off the chain, Cole!"
"That's right, Tazz. And SmackDown! is the only place the WWE Universe will find fast-paced action and youthful competitive spirit!"
"What you said--ha! Look out, Benjamin's setting up that T-Bone Suplex..."
But Carlito reverses it, lands on his feet behind Benjamin, and spins around, leaping into the air and driving his knees into his opponent. "Backstabber by Carlito! What a counter!" Shelton is writhing in pain on the canvas, but Christian rolls up Carlito from behind, sneaking a 2 count. Each man's agility is at odds with the others! This time, it's Carlito that rushes in with a clothesline off the roll-up. Christian ducks and nails the Killswitch for the 3 count as Benjamin tries to interrupt the pinfall but is too late.
"If you close your eyes..." Tony Chimel announces Christian as the victor as we see Batista confronting Eddie Guerrero backstage.
"So. I've got a match against you tonight. I might not be a smile and dance guy like you, but I'll admit... the crowd loves you for it, Eddie. And me? Well, I've got a title to gain. It hasn't been easy, that's for sure. Going to the back after a loss, it kind of calms me down to see you carrying on like you do. But... tonight, it just so happens that you're in the way of me doing that. Nothing personal."
Eddie responds with a silent nod as he locks eyes with the animal. "Oh, man, Cole. Batista telling it like it is. Dude's definitely on a warpath. Good luck, Eddie--whew!"
**************************************************************
VIVA LA RAZA!
"Ha-ha! Lying, cheating, stealing Latino Heat! Never get tired of it, Cole! I wonder if he stole that insane ride!"
The humor dies once Batista's music hits, flooring the audience who were contently enjoying Eddie's perky character. The two men stare each other down in the ring, and Latino Heat enrages the Animal throughout the contest, encouraging the wrath of Batista with silly antics that please the crowd. But Eddie is not merely a showman. He can wrestle. After a solid exchange, a would-be crippling spinebuster is reversed into a swinging DDT.
"I'm feeling froggy, baby!"
The crowd shares the sentiment, but Batista is there, racing up the turnbuckle to prevent Eddie's splash. Latino Heat knocks the clumsy brute off and aims the frog splash. It misses.
Batista rolls back up to his feet, stamping the mat in a rage. Eddie is clutching his stomach, slow to regain a vertical stance as Batista hoists him into the air.
"BATISTA BO--"
"EDDIE REVERSES!"
1...2...NO!
Despite the miraculous sunset flip pin attempt, Eddie calls upon the 3 Amigos to seal the Animal's fate. But Batista easily refuses and lifts him into the air, driving him down with that spinebuster intended for earlier use. Defying the crowd, Batista shakes the ropes and lifts Guerrero into the air again, satisfyingly destroying him with a thunderous powerbomb.
He celebrates, but the crowd doesn't approve. Just another rigid day in the life of the Animal.
Meanwhile, the cameras cut backstage to Rey Mysterio, ready to wrestle, who has a grimace on his face at the sight of his friend being overwhelmed by the leviathan Batista. They switch over to Rob Van Dam next, who is shadow boxing in his ring gear, ready for the imminent tables match, and finally swerve to the People's Champion, The Great One...THE ROCK.
Josh Matthews is standing alongside him. "Well, Rock, what are your thoughts going into this tables match?" The Rock's presence electrifies the crowd. He momentarily puts a hand over the microphone to acknowledge the fans that are shouting his name. ROCKY...ROCKY...ROCKY. "Finally... The Rock... has come back...to Colorado...Springs!
The Brahma Bull eyes Matthews and commands the entire WWE Universe into the palm of his hand. "Let The Rock tell you a story, Josh. It's about a little punk by the name of Randy Orton that thinks he's some 'Legend Killer' just because he got lucky and beat The Rock last week on Super SmackDown!. Well, uh-uh! See, The Rock's not a legend..." Matthews looks at him with a puzzled expression. "No, no, no... see, The Rock might have built himself one hell of a legacy with the help of the millions--"
AND MILLIONS!
"Of The Rock's fans, but The Rock isn't going away! The Rock is still on the map! He's still the People's Champion! And tonight, he's going to take his size 14' boot, shine it up nice and stick it straight up the Legend Killer's candy ass!"
"IF YA SMELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL....WHAT THE ROCK.....IS COOKIN'."
Cole and Tazz share their fondness for the Great One and say the match is up next as SD! takes a commercial break.
******************************************
Naturally, the turban-wearing duo are quite a buzz kill as they enter the arena, followed shortly by Orton. Between the 3 of them, not even Mount Everest could overcome the height of their egos. The suffering is brief, luckily, as Rey Mysterio makes his always popular arrival, followed closely by Mr. Thursday Night, Rob Van Dam. Between the two of them, they'll dazzle the crowd with their exciting wrestling styles. But they'll also be the first ones to be victimized by the tables that are positioned all around the squared circle. But that comes after...
IF YA SMELL…WHAT THE ROCK…IS COOKIN'!
"Here we go, Cole! I got goosebumps!"
The match is a violent, intense affair, pace high and by the mili-seconds as Rob Van Dam and Rey Mysterio collectively soar through the air, with both teams developing new creative ways to utilize the tables. Hassan drapes Mysterio over one that has fallen onto its side and locks him in an excruciating Camel Clutch submission hold until RVD's foot breaks it up. For his selfless efforts, however, Randy Orton does his own soaring and RKOs Mr. Thursday Night through a table to gain the first decision of the elimination style contest.
"Damn, Cole! RVD's gone! What an RKO..."
Shortly thereafter, it's the San Diego Sensation that goes flying through a table via a double team move by the two Arabs. Which... leaves The Rock alone in a 3-on-1 predicament. But The Rock digs down to his farthest depths and drops Daivari through a table with a samoan drop. "High Chief Rock getting it done!" Tazz exclaims as Cole announces the change of odds. But Orton & Hassan continue to beat down the disadvantaged People's Champion. After some taunting by Hassan, holding up his arms to a flood of boos from the crowd, he stalls one second too long. The Brahma Bull slips under his arm and slams him through a 2nd table. "ROCK BOTTOM! ROCK BOTTOM!"
"It's down to Orton & Rock now, Cole! O-oh, man!"
The two surviving members show flashes of last week's war in a steel cage, reversing each other's moves, but with more embitterment and animosity than before. Orton, as if being fueled by the tundra of boos, embraces the madness growing inside of him. He flips The Rock onto his shoulders and drives him hard, back down into the canvas, on his neck and spine.
"Orton showing strength I never knew he had with that maneuver, Tazz!"
"Not for nothing, Cole, that was impressive, no doubt!"
The boos grow louder as he maliciously cradles the People's Champion's head and neck into his wicked arms. "Orton's thinking RKO..." and Randy is as his stony eyes regard the nearby table, the only one left in the ring amidst the debris. He takes a running start, with The Rock's head firmly in his grasp, but he fails to secure the Brahma Bull's hands as well.
The crowd erupts into cheers as the self-proclaimed Legend Killer crumbles through the wooden surface, splitting it upon impact. The Rock's intensity is unmatched as he glowers down at Orton, his music playing as the referee cautiously lifts his arm to finalize the victory. "Look at the passion, Tazz, that is swimming in The Rock's eyes." Tazz feels like Orton got what he had coming to him.
But -
The cameras jump to a close-up zoom shot of a gold medal resting in the palm of Kurt Angle's hand. In his black, white and red attire, the Olympic Champion is ready to go to war. The band rests comfortably around his thick neck as the conviction in his eyes rivals The Rock's. The camera cuts to the World Heavyweight Champion, lights flickering in his dressing room as a pale white pair of eyes lurks in the darkness.
********************************************
In a showdown, it is clear these two men have studied each other well. Tenacious and unyielding, one reverses a leg drop on the apron into the ankle lock while the other scrambles over the security barrier, hopping over it to break the hold in the Falls Count Anywhere match. It is reversed into Hell's Gate, recently modified and reinstated by GM Teddy Long, as the challenger struggles awkwardly pinned over the barrier with the champion's massively sinister legs scrunched around his neck. Incredibly, the challenger desperately slips out.
A clothesline is evaded, and the champion is sent crashing onto the floor, twinges of pain shooting up his spine. "Angle Slam!" A 2 count follows, as the wrestling purist throws the champion back into the ring, frustrations growing to a fever pitch. But the Tombstone Piledriver threatens to make his pain go away, only if he doesn't slip out and claw at an ankle.
"The champion scrambling again, trying to break the hold..."
"The challenger trying to break the champ's ankle, ya mean!"
Angle is caught in the retaliatory snare of Hell's Gate, a clever counter to the grueling ankle lock. Angle lifts the champion off the canvas and slams him down to break the hold.
Moments pass in suspense, the collective heart of the audience stricken with nerves as to what might befall either popular superstar. The action tumbles outside of the ring again, and a steel chair extinguishes a portion of the challenger's frustration as it bangs off the champion's head. Removing the straps of his ring attire, Angle is roaring and set to finish this war.
He prepares the Undertaker for a 2nd Angle Slam, wrecking Tazz & Cole's table in the process. Slipping behind the champion, he pops his hips and squeezes on his hopes.
"Goozled, Cole!"
"CHOKESLAM through the TABLE!"
The audience has collapsed into aftershock. The match is over and the challenger is motionless amidst the pile of technical debris. "The - Phenom - is - victorious!"
Welcome to SmackDown! The WWE Universe is elecccctric tonight!
The bell rings, appeasing the eager fans. It's Chris Masters versus William Regal. The brawler from Black Pool, England confirms the moniker. Punches here, a t-bone suplex there, as he outmaneuvers Masters with his chain wrestling skills. But the sheer might of the Masterpiece endures and subdues the pugnacious Brit, wrapping him up for the submission victory.
"The Masterpiece using that awesome power to put down a feisty Regal."
"Thanks, Captain Obvious. But give it up to Regal. Masterpiece was taken to the limit here tonight!"
"Well, ladies and gentlemen, Teddy Long has approved what is sure to be an exciting if not brutal contest."
A graphic plays, displaying an elimination style tag team tables match between Daivari, Hassan, Orton & Mysterio, Van Dam & The Rock!
"Some ECW flavor tonight, Cole. I'm liking this! Good move by T-Lo tonight. Should be a rocket-buster."
"And even more importantly, after last week's dazzling triple threat match on Super SmackDown! 2, Kurt Angle and The Undertaker have agreed on a rematch."
A second graphic shows a Falls Count Anywhere contest for the coveted World Heavyweight Championship. "We've received word that the animal, Batista, tried to request a total rematch, but was denied by SmackDown! General Manager, Theodore Long."
"I'm sure Batista don't like being turned down, but props to the GM for having the gall to refuse that monster."
The ring bell clangs again.
"Can you dig it, SUCKA?!"
The crowd ignites for the lively Houston native as Booker T makes his way down to the ring, the stage still puffing out balls of flame as a determined look fills his eyes. "Book's in the zone tonight, Cole." Cole describes how Chris Jericho cheated to beat the Spin-a-Rooni Showman last week alongside footage of the incident. But the pompous rock star isn't concerned.
Jericho strolls down to the ring, pompous as always, self-proclaimed king of the world.
But Booker T is. And it shows. He's one step ahead of Jericho at every turn. A neat sunset flip from the corner nearly overcomes the Canadian Egotist. But Jericho rallies back, putting on a spectacle of technical wrestling. Booker T soon finds himself imprisoned in the Lion Tamer. "The pain HAS to be excruciating, Tazz!" But the crowd fuels Booker T on and helps him reach the ropes before the pain wins. High on adrenaline, Booker T is riding a wave of electricity, shocking Jericho at every turn once again. He rolls up to his feet as Jericho preps another Lionsault. As Jericho lands back down, rattled and stumbling backward, his head is still ducked as Booker T's scissors kick comes crashing down for the 1...2...3, with the cameras flashing within the crowd.
*********************************************************
"......GO!......."
"Here comes Christian, one half of the WWE Tag Team Champions."
"Who's he gesturing to, Cole? I d-don't get it!"
"C'mon, Tazz. Y'know as well as I do, that Christian is signaling to all of his 'peeps'."
"Right..."
"AIN'T NO STOPPING ME NOW!"
Shelton Benjamin makes his way onto the stage, followed by Carlito, all three men hearing boos from the crowd as the triple threat spectacle commences!
"Look out here...OH! What a clothesline by Captain Charisma. Knocked Carlito on his ass!"
Just as Christian levels the boastful superstar with that clothesline, Shelton Benjamin soars through the air from the top rope, spring-boarding into Christian, who is unaware of the devastating hit that easily outdoes his own clothesline! "Where the hell did Benjamin come from? This is off the chain, Cole!"
"That's right, Tazz. And SmackDown! is the only place the WWE Universe will find fast-paced action and youthful competitive spirit!"
"What you said--ha! Look out, Benjamin's setting up that T-Bone Suplex..."
But Carlito reverses it, lands on his feet behind Benjamin, and spins around, leaping into the air and driving his knees into his opponent. "Backstabber by Carlito! What a counter!" Shelton is writhing in pain on the canvas, but Christian rolls up Carlito from behind, sneaking a 2 count. Each man's agility is at odds with the others! This time, it's Carlito that rushes in with a clothesline off the roll-up. Christian ducks and nails the Killswitch for the 3 count as Benjamin tries to interrupt the pinfall but is too late.
"If you close your eyes..." Tony Chimel announces Christian as the victor as we see Batista confronting Eddie Guerrero backstage.
"So. I've got a match against you tonight. I might not be a smile and dance guy like you, but I'll admit... the crowd loves you for it, Eddie. And me? Well, I've got a title to gain. It hasn't been easy, that's for sure. Going to the back after a loss, it kind of calms me down to see you carrying on like you do. But... tonight, it just so happens that you're in the way of me doing that. Nothing personal."
Eddie responds with a silent nod as he locks eyes with the animal. "Oh, man, Cole. Batista telling it like it is. Dude's definitely on a warpath. Good luck, Eddie--whew!"
**************************************************************
VIVA LA RAZA!
"Ha-ha! Lying, cheating, stealing Latino Heat! Never get tired of it, Cole! I wonder if he stole that insane ride!"
The humor dies once Batista's music hits, flooring the audience who were contently enjoying Eddie's perky character. The two men stare each other down in the ring, and Latino Heat enrages the Animal throughout the contest, encouraging the wrath of Batista with silly antics that please the crowd. But Eddie is not merely a showman. He can wrestle. After a solid exchange, a would-be crippling spinebuster is reversed into a swinging DDT.
"I'm feeling froggy, baby!"
The crowd shares the sentiment, but Batista is there, racing up the turnbuckle to prevent Eddie's splash. Latino Heat knocks the clumsy brute off and aims the frog splash. It misses.
Batista rolls back up to his feet, stamping the mat in a rage. Eddie is clutching his stomach, slow to regain a vertical stance as Batista hoists him into the air.
"BATISTA BO--"
"EDDIE REVERSES!"
1...2...NO!
Despite the miraculous sunset flip pin attempt, Eddie calls upon the 3 Amigos to seal the Animal's fate. But Batista easily refuses and lifts him into the air, driving him down with that spinebuster intended for earlier use. Defying the crowd, Batista shakes the ropes and lifts Guerrero into the air again, satisfyingly destroying him with a thunderous powerbomb.
He celebrates, but the crowd doesn't approve. Just another rigid day in the life of the Animal.
Meanwhile, the cameras cut backstage to Rey Mysterio, ready to wrestle, who has a grimace on his face at the sight of his friend being overwhelmed by the leviathan Batista. They switch over to Rob Van Dam next, who is shadow boxing in his ring gear, ready for the imminent tables match, and finally swerve to the People's Champion, The Great One...THE ROCK.
Josh Matthews is standing alongside him. "Well, Rock, what are your thoughts going into this tables match?" The Rock's presence electrifies the crowd. He momentarily puts a hand over the microphone to acknowledge the fans that are shouting his name. ROCKY...ROCKY...ROCKY. "Finally... The Rock... has come back...to Colorado...Springs!
The Brahma Bull eyes Matthews and commands the entire WWE Universe into the palm of his hand. "Let The Rock tell you a story, Josh. It's about a little punk by the name of Randy Orton that thinks he's some 'Legend Killer' just because he got lucky and beat The Rock last week on Super SmackDown!. Well, uh-uh! See, The Rock's not a legend..." Matthews looks at him with a puzzled expression. "No, no, no... see, The Rock might have built himself one hell of a legacy with the help of the millions--"
AND MILLIONS!
"Of The Rock's fans, but The Rock isn't going away! The Rock is still on the map! He's still the People's Champion! And tonight, he's going to take his size 14' boot, shine it up nice and stick it straight up the Legend Killer's candy ass!"
"IF YA SMELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL....WHAT THE ROCK.....IS COOKIN'."
Cole and Tazz share their fondness for the Great One and say the match is up next as SD! takes a commercial break.
******************************************
Naturally, the turban-wearing duo are quite a buzz kill as they enter the arena, followed shortly by Orton. Between the 3 of them, not even Mount Everest could overcome the height of their egos. The suffering is brief, luckily, as Rey Mysterio makes his always popular arrival, followed closely by Mr. Thursday Night, Rob Van Dam. Between the two of them, they'll dazzle the crowd with their exciting wrestling styles. But they'll also be the first ones to be victimized by the tables that are positioned all around the squared circle. But that comes after...
IF YA SMELL…WHAT THE ROCK…IS COOKIN'!
"Here we go, Cole! I got goosebumps!"
The match is a violent, intense affair, pace high and by the mili-seconds as Rob Van Dam and Rey Mysterio collectively soar through the air, with both teams developing new creative ways to utilize the tables. Hassan drapes Mysterio over one that has fallen onto its side and locks him in an excruciating Camel Clutch submission hold until RVD's foot breaks it up. For his selfless efforts, however, Randy Orton does his own soaring and RKOs Mr. Thursday Night through a table to gain the first decision of the elimination style contest.
"Damn, Cole! RVD's gone! What an RKO..."
Shortly thereafter, it's the San Diego Sensation that goes flying through a table via a double team move by the two Arabs. Which... leaves The Rock alone in a 3-on-1 predicament. But The Rock digs down to his farthest depths and drops Daivari through a table with a samoan drop. "High Chief Rock getting it done!" Tazz exclaims as Cole announces the change of odds. But Orton & Hassan continue to beat down the disadvantaged People's Champion. After some taunting by Hassan, holding up his arms to a flood of boos from the crowd, he stalls one second too long. The Brahma Bull slips under his arm and slams him through a 2nd table. "ROCK BOTTOM! ROCK BOTTOM!"
"It's down to Orton & Rock now, Cole! O-oh, man!"
The two surviving members show flashes of last week's war in a steel cage, reversing each other's moves, but with more embitterment and animosity than before. Orton, as if being fueled by the tundra of boos, embraces the madness growing inside of him. He flips The Rock onto his shoulders and drives him hard, back down into the canvas, on his neck and spine.
"Orton showing strength I never knew he had with that maneuver, Tazz!"
"Not for nothing, Cole, that was impressive, no doubt!"
The boos grow louder as he maliciously cradles the People's Champion's head and neck into his wicked arms. "Orton's thinking RKO..." and Randy is as his stony eyes regard the nearby table, the only one left in the ring amidst the debris. He takes a running start, with The Rock's head firmly in his grasp, but he fails to secure the Brahma Bull's hands as well.
The crowd erupts into cheers as the self-proclaimed Legend Killer crumbles through the wooden surface, splitting it upon impact. The Rock's intensity is unmatched as he glowers down at Orton, his music playing as the referee cautiously lifts his arm to finalize the victory. "Look at the passion, Tazz, that is swimming in The Rock's eyes." Tazz feels like Orton got what he had coming to him.
But -
The cameras jump to a close-up zoom shot of a gold medal resting in the palm of Kurt Angle's hand. In his black, white and red attire, the Olympic Champion is ready to go to war. The band rests comfortably around his thick neck as the conviction in his eyes rivals The Rock's. The camera cuts to the World Heavyweight Champion, lights flickering in his dressing room as a pale white pair of eyes lurks in the darkness.
********************************************
In a showdown, it is clear these two men have studied each other well. Tenacious and unyielding, one reverses a leg drop on the apron into the ankle lock while the other scrambles over the security barrier, hopping over it to break the hold in the Falls Count Anywhere match. It is reversed into Hell's Gate, recently modified and reinstated by GM Teddy Long, as the challenger struggles awkwardly pinned over the barrier with the champion's massively sinister legs scrunched around his neck. Incredibly, the challenger desperately slips out.
A clothesline is evaded, and the champion is sent crashing onto the floor, twinges of pain shooting up his spine. "Angle Slam!" A 2 count follows, as the wrestling purist throws the champion back into the ring, frustrations growing to a fever pitch. But the Tombstone Piledriver threatens to make his pain go away, only if he doesn't slip out and claw at an ankle.
"The champion scrambling again, trying to break the hold..."
"The challenger trying to break the champ's ankle, ya mean!"
Angle is caught in the retaliatory snare of Hell's Gate, a clever counter to the grueling ankle lock. Angle lifts the champion off the canvas and slams him down to break the hold.
Moments pass in suspense, the collective heart of the audience stricken with nerves as to what might befall either popular superstar. The action tumbles outside of the ring again, and a steel chair extinguishes a portion of the challenger's frustration as it bangs off the champion's head. Removing the straps of his ring attire, Angle is roaring and set to finish this war.
He prepares the Undertaker for a 2nd Angle Slam, wrecking Tazz & Cole's table in the process. Slipping behind the champion, he pops his hips and squeezes on his hopes.
"Goozled, Cole!"
"CHOKESLAM through the TABLE!"
The audience has collapsed into aftershock. The match is over and the challenger is motionless amidst the pile of technical debris. "The - Phenom - is - victorious!"
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